Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
I was just reading a thread someone posted that's struggling and asking for help and advice with her alcoholism that's new here.
She received a lot of good feedback until someone had the nerve to private message her that this is a support group for people who are in AA and she should consider another group, this is totally false.
To think someone that's in recovery and suppose to be reaching out and help the suffering alcoholic say something like that is unreal. I have a good idea who its is always telling people that there way and AA is the only way, and if its not in the Big Book its a outside issue. This is the type of shit that kills people when reaching out seeking help. You should be ashamed of yourself. I found my way though AA and have to tell ya its things like this that gives AA a bad name.
I see it all the time on here people asking for advise and the same people tell them to go to AA even when its mention they want to seek something besides AA.
Rants over but please remember this tell people what your experience is instead of telling them what they need to do because that's the way you did it..
She received a lot of good feedback until someone had the nerve to private message her that this is a support group for people who are in AA and she should consider another group, this is totally false.
To think someone that's in recovery and suppose to be reaching out and help the suffering alcoholic say something like that is unreal. I have a good idea who its is always telling people that there way and AA is the only way, and if its not in the Big Book its a outside issue. This is the type of shit that kills people when reaching out seeking help. You should be ashamed of yourself. I found my way though AA and have to tell ya its things like this that gives AA a bad name.
I see it all the time on here people asking for advise and the same people tell them to go to AA even when its mention they want to seek something besides AA.
Rants over but please remember this tell people what your experience is instead of telling them what they need to do because that's the way you did it..
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check out that smoke ring. It tasted really good. I smothered it with Maulls BBQ sauce which is Local to St. Louis and one of the best I ever had.....
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I was recently separated from my wife of 33 years and it's complicated. Anyway I rented a room about 15 minutes away and I see my kids about once a week. I see the people who own the house I live in once in a while but other than that I stay in my room where I do my cooking, wash dishes in the shower, read, color, and sleep. I get out at least once a day. I grocery shop and I attend 2 meetings...
True enough that there are a small number of people with an agenda to push, and that's sad.
There is nothing wrong with suggesting to someone that they should consider AA, even if they may be reluctant or unsure. That is how I was a few years ago and I detested AA as well so it took suggestions from a few people before I considered going to a meeting. I hate to think of where I would be now if those people had not pointed me in the direction of AA.
However, as you have rightly pointed out, this is most definitely NOT an AA forum and I for one am glad that other opinions are expressed, even if they are sometimes contrary to my own beliefs. There will always be misguided individuals in every walk of life who believe that their way is the only way and there is very little that anyone can do about that. It is for other people to speak out as you have done here and to keep repeating the message that everyone is welcome on D.S.
Billy
Youre right, gjm; this gives AA a terrible legacy. I cant, for the life of me, understand why that PM was sent. Its so counter-productive.
I dont know where scorpiotm4 is but I hope no damage has been done to her.
Again, whoever authored the PM----shame on you.
Anyway-I think that I heard that a lot at the beginning and it scared the crap out of me. I was scared of everything though. A person who really wants to work to get sober will weed out the bad advice eventually. Atleast I did.
I don't believe that AA is the only way to get and stay sober but I can only talk about my own recovery - which is through AA, therefore I suggest trying AA. Sometimes too, people say that they have been to AA and it's not for them or they didn't have a good experience, or that they are atheists and don't like the God stuff. I often then suggest that they may have a better experience at other groups, or that atheists can get sober in AA.
Suggestions are not instructions. Many people also post that they are looking for advice or ask 'What should I do.' There I think suggestions of what to do or where to go or what is helpful are apposite.
I think KK might be onto something -- perhaps those relentless AA members are afraid -- without AA they have nothing. Or maybe they fear they have put so much of themselves into AA and -- hey wait -- you can be happily sober without it.. A scary thought if your identity is all tied into the group and program. Or maybe it is just arrogance.
I listen to people and if they say they do not want to go to AA, I do not beg them to change their minds. I first ask if they every gave AA a shot. I realize from the many people I know here and elsewhere that AA is a lot different in each state and town. Not all is good. Old timers trying to run things, newcomers trying to take over, etc. I refuse today to push anything on anyone who does not ask for my opinion, suggestion, or thoughts. I tell them how I got sober. Me. No one else.
To think someone would suggest the things gjm mentioned is not right. That person needs to look at their recovery and what they want out of this group. Tks for the posting gjm.
The room is title Alcoholism Support Group. Not People in AA Support Group
I have come to believe that I'm not an alcoholic but knew I had to alter my relationship with alcohol. For some, this is a mask of being in denial. I have my local AA friends, have shared my journey and they suggest they're always here for me - in open meetings and outside meetings for a coffee. I
I have always been told that there are many different roads that take us to sobriety, only problem is, some are paved and some are dirt roads, it's whatever works for you. Oh and I made up the part about the road conditions :)
I personally don't think it a negative thing to have the discussion about AA vs. other means. I think it's healthy if done without judgment or shame or accusation, regardless of which side we fall down on.
AA has been life changing for me personally. I went to Al anon as a kid thanks to my mom. Even with that basis, I did fight going into AA though for years. I finally did and it became my foundation to work on other issues. It wasn't just AA alone that helped me. It did open the door for me to work on my codependency issues and COA issues.
It's all helpful, imo.
Even if this was a strictly AA group, its pure evil to send a message like that to someone crying out for help and support! It would be mean-spirited under any circumstances, but the fact that the original post was made by someone that was clearly feeling profoundly depressed makes that PM exceptionally twisted. Im no expert on AA, but Im pretty sure practicing overt acts of cruelty is NOT one of the traditions.
To PJ54: We were both participating on that thread. Yes, you encouraged the poster to check out AA. I thought you did so in a way that was caring, respectful, and not overbearing. You werent a bully or a preacher. You didnt threaten imminent doom should the poster opt not follow up on your suggestion. You didn't attack those of us that made some different suggestions. There is nothing wrong with your saying Hey, AA really helped me. Consider keeping an open mind about it. I wouldn't consider you an example of the behavior this post is (rightly) criticizing.