Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
Prior to my drinking I never felt complete, I always felt as if there was something missing as if there was a part of me not there.
Then as a 13 yo boy I had a drink of marsarla and that enticing embrace of alcohol spread through me and this wonderful thing happened. I felt complete, I felt as if I was now the person I wanted to be, this magical stuff made me whole.
Unfortunately I was to learn many years later that this magical stuff also made that incompleteness bigger and it took more and more of the magic to try and get that feeling of completeness. And I never reached the euphoria of completeness that I felt as a 13 yo ever again.
I came to see the imcompleteness as a hole in my sole and the more alcohol I poured in to fill that hole the bigger the hole became requiring yet more alcohol. I was like a dog chasing it's tail.
Somewhere on this journey a role reversal happened where the magic no longer served me I served it. It became my master and I had to run my life to the magic's wishes, I was no longer in control.
The magic is a very selfish power and it now just took and took it wanted everything from me, It wanted to take away my wife, my children, my home, my job, in fact it wanted my life.
I tried to fight the control the magic had over me I tried many times but every time I stopped taking the magic the hole in my soul became unbearable. The hole made me even worse to be around and I received no relief from the pain of the hole till I tried to again fill it with the magic.
What was I to do? I was in such a predicament I could not live with the magic nor could I live without it, the pain I was in without the magic was unbearable. I did not have the power within me to fight the hold the magic had over me.
Fortunately I found something to fill that hole and the funny thing is what I found actually made that hole smaller and smaller. The more I used of this something the smaller the hole became and the smaller the hole became the better I felt. Then one day I woke up and for the first time I can remember I woke up feeling complete and there was not a drop of magic in me. I found a more powerful magic that could beat the lies and false promises of alcohol. And this new magic has never asked me for anything nor does it make false promises, it really just wants what is best for me.
G8
Then as a 13 yo boy I had a drink of marsarla and that enticing embrace of alcohol spread through me and this wonderful thing happened. I felt complete, I felt as if I was now the person I wanted to be, this magical stuff made me whole.
Unfortunately I was to learn many years later that this magical stuff also made that incompleteness bigger and it took more and more of the magic to try and get that feeling of completeness. And I never reached the euphoria of completeness that I felt as a 13 yo ever again.
I came to see the imcompleteness as a hole in my sole and the more alcohol I poured in to fill that hole the bigger the hole became requiring yet more alcohol. I was like a dog chasing it's tail.
Somewhere on this journey a role reversal happened where the magic no longer served me I served it. It became my master and I had to run my life to the magic's wishes, I was no longer in control.
The magic is a very selfish power and it now just took and took it wanted everything from me, It wanted to take away my wife, my children, my home, my job, in fact it wanted my life.
I tried to fight the control the magic had over me I tried many times but every time I stopped taking the magic the hole in my soul became unbearable. The hole made me even worse to be around and I received no relief from the pain of the hole till I tried to again fill it with the magic.
What was I to do? I was in such a predicament I could not live with the magic nor could I live without it, the pain I was in without the magic was unbearable. I did not have the power within me to fight the hold the magic had over me.
Fortunately I found something to fill that hole and the funny thing is what I found actually made that hole smaller and smaller. The more I used of this something the smaller the hole became and the smaller the hole became the better I felt. Then one day I woke up and for the first time I can remember I woke up feeling complete and there was not a drop of magic in me. I found a more powerful magic that could beat the lies and false promises of alcohol. And this new magic has never asked me for anything nor does it make false promises, it really just wants what is best for me.
G8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKWzam4zv4w
What I know...
Drinking from age 12-22 made life okay and sometimes even fun.
From 22-32 drinking made me numb mostly with occasional fun.
From 32-35 drinking brought me nothing but misery.
Periods of sobriety from 32-35 were a mix pink cloud and absolute insanity where thoughts of suicide seemed rational.
February of age 35, I finally got sober and found a solution. When I work on that solution, life is pretty okay again and sometimes even fun. I still have some pretty horrendous rough spots, but I no longer HAVE to drink. Life is different and I am learning. I see "magic" in it for sure but I have a long way to go.
Sobriety, and the process of getting here, sure has been interesting.
Nice share G8.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=klGCe7BqmkE
...Gnon
as for the lip sync........have you ever wandered the day speaking like the classic godzilla films......delay and then speaking again....LOL
it cracks me up how i amuse myself.......watching people is a favorite.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=recCUsEdf8k