In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, it says that we are not cured of our alcoholism and warns of "resting on our laurels."  I've done this several times in my several years of sobriety, and it never gets any less painful.  However, the gift of sobriety contains many paradox's, and this is one where, it is a win-win, I either stay astute and maintain a routine humble, that addresses the problem daily, or I gain some pain, and grow, by trying to manage my own life within a world of ignorance.  Either way, I don't think we can escape being ourselves, even with a consideration of having free will, so it is important to take constant inventory for me, to see, exactly what my mind, body, and spirit are doing and believing.  

Carrying the vision of God's will into our lives, is an important reference point if I am to start wondering if I need an inventory?  First and foremost God's will is for me to be sane, and sober.  Ignorant world's do not produce sanity or sobriety.  It's that simple, for me.  I don't have to inventory why another is ignorant or this or that, but I do have to inventory if when and where I am, doing work, is making me sane or sober?  I have proof that God removed my desire to drink, several years ago, in less than a minute, so where I work won't affect if I drink or not.  However, with the information that the selfishness center's inside of the brain, coming from the society called AA, I can consider that being a factor if I become insane.  

If I am waking up every morning and giving my life to God, unselfishly, and I am then encountering problems from others, who probably haven't given their lives to God that morning, because they are more than likely too fear driven to do so, which is sad, but understandable, if you are ignorant, that tells me that it is an environmental problem and a type of people problem, making me insane. 

God did the work to make me sober, and I think the deal in his will is for me to do the work to surround myself with people who don't make me insane.  That never happens in my work life, it happens in my non-work like often, but rarely ever happens in my work life.  What happens in my work life is some fool usually moves on into it, too ignorant to know that I know, despite them not knowing, and I get sick, and end up wanting to hurt them.  Once upon a time though, before I was able to not drink, I used to pray, and then ignore problems, and they would just end up being gone. 

I think the most important thing is when I give my life to God in the morning, first and foremost, it shows I am loving God more than anything else, and that proves I don't love alcohol, I don't love unmanagability, I don't love insanity, I don't love directing my own life, but I am getting results from others that would signal I do love alcohol, I do love unmanagability, I do love insanity, and I do love directing my own life, that tells me there is a God disconnect with them, that tells me they aren't quite there yet.  That's a good thing because my given vision from God of God's will is that others need him more than anyone else, does, including me, so we are all equal in our needs for God.  

I ask God for his will, even in my inventory, and his will includes me sometimes being too human to admit others defects or admit how others see my defects.  For instance I might use dishonestly to showcase to others that I have less flaws then them, and I know for certain many men do that, and will do that as a stragegy to earn more, win more, and be more.  The most important thing is I have to use dishonesty to get to that point of more, and that is not what God has told me, or anyone else, last time I checked, honesty was the best policy. 

If I look at my policy as dishonesty, can I have the courage to dishonor my policy and start a new policy of just admitting I am not as good as others?  I've done that in the past and it is very honest to do so.  It's not going to rest well with ignorance, but isn't ignorance just dishonesty without even knowing it is and just an opportunity to learn?  Always.  So this process of 10th step is a win-win.  When I'm wrong I become right because God has the life and when I'm right I don't have to experience wrong. 

One of the most important suggestions I used when I was young in sobriety was the concept of "proper use of willpower."  Forcing myself to clean, forcing myself to care, forcing myself to read, forcing myself to go to meetings, forcing myself to have hope, all of it was used in the process of respecting proper use of willpower.  This can be hard for some, who believe life isn't supposed to be one chronic experience of hard work, and in fact, I don't think this proper use of willpower concept works for all.  If I am powerless absolutely, no amout of willpower could ever match God's power.  I think people obsessed with being too god-like, have to use this principle to build up short term lines of discipline, that was lacking for a long time in their lives, so it's important to remind myself that AA is the help, not the boss.  God is the boss. 

If the boss requires you to use the help, how are you going to argue with that?  You aren't or you might be dead if you do, and it's real like that, so all of that has to be included in the inventory process, when I am asking myself, how seriously am I taking this requirement to be sober from above? 

My will is fun, my will is attractive, my will makes people feel something special, most of the time, but I have to be honest and say that my will isn't always as considerate and caring as God's will.  The tenets of unselfishness, dishonesty, and fear, and if they are present are the exact reason why 10th steps are done, if you are a fundamentalist, but if you are not, then I think you also can find out how defects at this step might or might not be making you sober or sane. 

Alot of people get the 10th step and the 11th step mixed up just like the 8th and the 9th step.  In the 10th step all I am doing is searching for wrongs, according to me and God, and I have to be careful to believe human powers that believe I am wrong, when they didn't ask me if I was giving my life to God, prior to interacting with them, so how could I be wrong if the first thing I do in the morning is give myself to the most powerful and then you have a problem with me after?  If I am drinking or in an insane asylum, I clearly did something wrong, if I put myself there, but there are people so fucked up in this world that they will frame others to be drinking or put them in mental asylums for their own sanity, and not the person put in the mental hopsitals sanity.  I have to be very careful when asking myself if I did wrong when the idea of what I do being wrong is coming from other humans.  I've done a lot of wrong, telling God prior, I am doing this in spite of you.  He still loved me, so I stopped doing that, and can't do it any further, well I can, but I don't, so part of my inventory process is knowing that other's just aren't there yet, and that's fine, because God is in control of everything and will never be not perfect like all of us are.