Don't know how to reply, other than, in my experience, nothing is so bad sober that getting drunk over doesn't make 1000% worse.

OK, that kind of quick-relief response is like borrowing money from the mafia - you'll cry bitter tears about it pretty quickly.

Do you think anybody will be willing to help a drugged out drunk? I'm more inclined to help people with a sense of responsibility and a willingness to work for themselves.

And lots of people read this forum and share experiences and encourage each other, so maybe you're wrong about other things too?

keepitsimple39, I think you know that's bullshit, otherwise you wouldn't have even bothered posting on a board like this one. I can relate though... I feel for ya. EARLY sobriety sucks, I'll agree with ya on that much... all I can say was that for me, it was well worth the wait for it to get better. Of course, I had to do more than just watch time go by without picking up a beer or a drug.. had to work on myself a little to and work my ass off to accomplish stuff that would make life better so that I'd know exactly what the point is to this recovery thing. I know it probably seems easy for me to reply like this since I'm fairly happy right now and life is going well, but I started out feeling right where you're at now... life falling apart. But I found that I could handle it and pull through it so long as I stayed sober, and over time it payed off. I will pray for you, sir

Yeah I can relate what your saying there was a time I felt the same way, until I made a decision enough was enough after a very long time out in the madness and became wiling to do whatever had to be done.

Its amazing what we can do when acceptance and wiliness comes and to play and take some direction.

Hope find what your looking for here.

i cant accept the fact that i need to be clean, so maybe i shouldn't post here anymore?

you're certainly welcomed to post here regardless of your stage of recovery or lack thereof. We have a whole range of folks here, from 30-some years sober/clean, to the poor souls who are in the stage of it where there on the wagon a couple days, off a couple, and those who've never stopped drinking and/or using but do have at least some concern about their problems with substances. Although you're welcomed here no matter which catagory you fit into, you may not find the feedback and support provided here to be of value to you if your goal is something other than being clean/sober. Most of us on here have the goal of total and sustained abstinance from substance use, and tend to give advice and feedback under the assumption that everyone on here wants the same things we want. I've seen that cause frustration and a little bit of disliking toward a lot of members here before. It's up to you

Rome wasn't built in a day my friend and sobriety will get more comfortable if you stay with it.
Right now the stinking thing has you by the you know what . You have to learn how to cope instead of escape and it takes time. Go to a meeting.

Desperation brought me to want sobriety more than alcohol. It was a no brainer for me. I had suffered enough to be open minded to anything that would help me stay sober. That's how I ended up slithering into the rooms of AA.

It wasn't easy. I had to walk in all by myself amongst all those strangers. But I did it because I knew I couldn't go back to the misery. My husband left when I had a year and a day sober. I had sobered up but not changed the way I did things. Hell, I'da left me if I could. Since then, I have had a life worth living. My obsession with booze has been removed through the 12 Steps and life in the last almost 20 years has been incredible.

If you're sober and you don't want to be, I hope you change your mind. Might want to check out N/A (drugs) or AA(alcohol). Meetings everywhere. You don't have to do this alone.

I'm sorry that's where you are at. Been there, so can relate. My life isn't perfect today however I'm blessed, grateful daily, and can say life and sobriety are beyond amazing. It takes me a ton of step work, etc etc but today I don't have to drink to get the relief booze and other stuff gave me for 20 years.
Hope you find your way.

If drugged up and drunk were truly better than sober, I wouldn't have gotten sober either. It had to get worse to stay in the shit than it was to climb out.

It pays off to put work into recovery. Hard to believe in the beginning. Sobriety does kick my ass once in awhile.

having social anxiety disorder doesnt help because i am scared pantless when it comes to being around strange people, hence why i stay at home.

Life is difficult at times for everyone - sober or drinking. I have a life of ups and downs and I do not drink!

Being sober means you have control over your decisions - you are not in a fog. Being sober means your body is not being ruined by liquor.

I came through a divorce, lost several family members over the years, moved a few times - and I was sober despite any crisis that happened.

Be the best you can be - honor yourself.