Usual advice-try an AA meeting or 2-you don't have to buy into anything. Just be around other alcoholics and switch sides! Also make some friends here too who have been where you are and got free. Good luck! xxx

Thank you! I've really needed a kind word today! I've been sober before. I've done AA I just took little step back. I'm not as bad as I was before? but I'm disappointed in self! It's not putting down, it's when am I going to pick up again! That's what hurts the most! All that progress lost!

I thought I was "in two deep" too. I was wrong, in a short while God reversed everything, as a matter of fact, within six months, people were doing a double take asking if I was the same person who was so far gone.

I remember everything being so complex, confusing, and complicated. I saw that it was complex, confusing, and complicated because I was trying to fix it. Make a long story short, I gave up trying, I kept trying to figure everything out, and I stopped one day, as a response to someone saying no to a plan I had just constructed, that if they had said yes, would have allowed me to not be homeless.

I remember sitting there, shocked that I was homeless, and that nobody gave fuck I was homeless either. Then amazingly I got a sense that God cared, and God didn't want me to be homeless, and I then had the strength to allow him to take control, I saw me thinking I had the power to control my own life was the real weakness.

I still get sick, just last night I posted a sick post, in where I doubt God, but I got some sleep, have done some self-searching this morning, and thank God for your post, because it reminded me of that day that I surrendered and was embraced by God, it was one of the highlights of my life, and to think the embrace came after I saw I was a hopeless, homeless, alcoholic with no human support or human power to love me.

Humans don't have the power to love us often, as a matter a fact, if you're a real alcoholic, drinking or not, people will as a norm find reasons to resent you, I cannot escape the human flaw of wanting too much from me, criticism all the time, all these fucking humans thinking they are perfect or have the judgment power to tell any of us what to do, I am OVER the human being to be frank.

I bet after the embracing spirit that I have come to believe was certainly God, I'll never not love that spirit, so my point is don't be surprised if a miracle for you is around the corner, but I doubt it will come from a human being.

Piece of shit humans with their wars, money, and stupid opinions.

Progress is never truly lost. Look at it like experience and practice to what you can accomplish today.

Do you think your dad would want you to throw in the towel and tap out like he did? Think about it.

A great place to start would be with your doctor, who can discuss treatment options with you and point you in the right direction.

God Bless

I used to drink daily years ago. I was a functional alcoholic. I got tired of being sick and tired. When I started counting the cost of my alcohol abuse (hangovers, days off from work, breakdown of relationships, money spent, dreams non existent) versus the cost of being alcohol free (happy, healthy relationships, more money to spend, dreams developed), I chose the alcohol free lifestyle. It wasn't easy. I asked GOD to remove the taste of alcohol from me. He did. It's been over 10 years, never looked back. You can do it! There is a purpose for your life. I'm rooting for you.

I'm sorry to hear how frustrated you are right now. I pretty sure we can all relate to you about how difficult it is to change. Change is a fearful word, especially when you put it into action. We are all so used to and comfortable in our own little boxes that we have made for ourselves and live in. They feel safe and secure. I have found to change in my own life takes dedication and discipline. If you are very serious about wanting change in your life, here are Five Points that work.

CHANGING:
1. It begins with one principal- Only one you can change is you.
A). You can Change how you interact with people. (Attitude, actions and reactions).
B). Do not boast or preach.
2. Be Specific - What is it exactly, you want to Change? I recommend praying to the LORD, specifically for the hard things and needed help and support. And have Him show you how to
change.
3. Give Up Blame - We all have choices and make up our own minds. Nothing will Change until you give up the blame.
4. Seek To Understand - What is the motivation? What is it that keeps tempting you and bringing you back?
5. The Golden Rule:
"Treat others as you want them to treat you." Take the word (Treat) out of there and replace it with the word (Understand). Understand your behavior before, during and after the situation. Now examine yourself.
A). The more you understand yourself the dilemma and the need and the desire to Change, the more you will be open to want to Change. The more people will start to see your seriousness of it.

I hope this will help. God Bless you and I will be praying for you!