Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
I did drink this Thanksgiving.
Not enough to get drunk and do stupid things, remember most of the evening, but it still counts. Did 4 months before that damn it. The slight ray of good in this is that I did not like it much even when I drank, go figure. Maybe I am changing? Anyway, decided I am not going to chew too much on it and will look up to the future instead. The urges are back and just got through a bad one today. Held it together, with big help from you folks at DS (3 days accumulation now :)
I cannot understand myself, why do I need to drink in order to have a good time? I have to resolve this before Christmas and New Year.
It is like hardwired into my thinking. Shall I drop these events altogether?
I read several comments of people here making this Thanksgiving sober, and I know it is possible, but I have to crack that nut myself and for myself.
Will keep you posted.
Not enough to get drunk and do stupid things, remember most of the evening, but it still counts. Did 4 months before that damn it. The slight ray of good in this is that I did not like it much even when I drank, go figure. Maybe I am changing? Anyway, decided I am not going to chew too much on it and will look up to the future instead. The urges are back and just got through a bad one today. Held it together, with big help from you folks at DS (3 days accumulation now :)
I cannot understand myself, why do I need to drink in order to have a good time? I have to resolve this before Christmas and New Year.
It is like hardwired into my thinking. Shall I drop these events altogether?
I read several comments of people here making this Thanksgiving sober, and I know it is possible, but I have to crack that nut myself and for myself.
Will keep you posted.
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Dick Van Dyke’s path to sobriety was a turning point in his life and career. Here’s what happened:How He Got SoberStruggles and Realization: Van Dyke began drinking as a teenager, largely to cope with shyness and social anxiety. Alcohol made him feel more comfortable in social settings, but over time, his drinking spiraled out of control. By his mid-40s, he recognized that he had an addictive...
Don't do thanksgiving here, but Christmas on way, I too associate drink with loads of things, having a takeaway, meals out, christening infact most things, I'm 5 weeks in this time and trying not to focus on Christmas. Doing a day at a time, I plan in advance now I even practised in my head saying 'coke please' to the bar staff when going out for a meal so I'd know what to say. Normally would be 'f@ck it I'll have a pint' habit? Routine? Maybe.....
Drinks gonna be about, don't mean you have to, your choice. I'm gonna say to myself 'I choose' not to drink not I won't, as too much pressure, I'm choosing not too because all of the negative crap it gives me,
Good luck, merry Christmas in advance lol
English.
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2013/12/wasted-34.jpg
http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2013/12/wasted-12.jpg
How about telling us exactly how it came about that you took that first drink so that we can learn to avoid what lured you. So, in the spirit of recent spirited discussion, is this event a relapse or a 'slip'?
Maybe this treatise will shed light on this relapse phenomenon:
Overview
Relapse is a critical event in the cessation of all addictive behaviors, and is important in the process of changing alcohol consumption. Temptation and self-efficacy have been identified as important predictors of relapse. Additionally, the relationship between temptation and self-efficacy has been a predictor of outcome (Project MATCH, 1997). Relapse vulnerability (RV) is a measure of the relationship between temptation to drink and self-efficacy to abstain. This study examined whether end-of-treatment RV (temptation minus confidence) predicted three dimensions of relapse severity: time to first drink, amount of drinks on first drinking day, and duration of drinking during the first week. Data were analyzed from Project MATCH, a multi-site treatment study designed to reduce alcohol consumption in alcohol dependent participants. Relapse vulnerability at end-of-treatment was related to all three relapse severity dimensions during the follow-up period. Additionally, end-of-treatment subscale scores of relapse vulnerability differentially predicted relapse severity, with social/positive relapse vulnerability predicting time to first drink, negative affect relapse vulnerability predicting amount of drinks on first drinking day, and withdrawal/urges relapse vulnerability predicting duration of drinking during the first week. Results suggest that posttreatment measurement of the discrepancy between temptation and self-efficacy is a sensitive predictor of various dimensions of relapse severity.
And here's some excerpt pages for your reading pleasure:
http://books.google.com/books?id=cUxKS4g3xxQC&pg=PA24&lpg=PA24&dq=relapse+seriousness&source=bl&ots=iwuNag_ihX&sig=BDfnFddCj9i7Ye3SMVIxQG1R9Mk&hl=en&sa=X&ei=gfGRUuq8FLG2sATO-oDQBw&ved=0CE4Q6AEwBDgK#v=onepage&q=relapse%20seriousness&f=false
The Role Of Temptation And Self-Efficacy As Predictors Of Relapse Severity In Posttreatment Alcoholics. by Meredith Anne Holmgren
Yes avoid places where alcohol is served if you are feeling unsure. Also question the thought that drinking = good times = feeling better. Not so for those who cannot drink safely. You did not enjoy that drink particularly you say.
Interesting article MeeMoMo.
In my first months I did a lot of mental prep before gatherings where lots of people would be drinking. I would picture myself having fun and not drinking. I would imagine myself at dinner, picking up a glass of soda or water, while others were drinking wine, and being okay with that. i would think about how I would handle toasts and what I would say when someone offered to get me a drink. By the time I got to the gathering I was okay and never had that difficult of a time of it.
Others here use similar methods. Sticky has talked about bringing along a friend in recovery for Thanksgiving. A couple of other people make a point of spending time with the kids. Others avoid gatherings where people are drinking.
Now that you know what you are up against, you can be better prepared for Christmas or the next dinner where you might feel tempted. You can change your internal wiring so this gets easy, but at least for me, it took some time and a bit of work.
Onward and upward. and thanks again for you helped me today
1is2many
Hard to say why exactly I picked up the glass. I had very difficult time imaging how to go through 5-6 hours of total challenge. As suggested, I planned what I would do or say but the fear and anxiety that I will slip got to my nerves and I paradoxically slipped because of that. It was my party, cannot escape or run away. At least marked several people I might stick around next time as we found some common grounds to talk about and not just the silly uninhibited crap that comes out from "lubricated" by alcohol social interactions.
No silver bullet here. Have to really figure it out as this is my Rubicon. The H.A.L.T. is not bug think for me. Not sure but looks like I mostly want to drink to enhance moments of joy/feeling good (and ruin them of course at the end) rather than when I am low. As many have stated below quitting is not just a process of wicking the habit but also a journey into one's soul and reasoning.
Stay positive friends!
You say you want to stay sober. What is the plan? What is different this time? Until you make sustainable changes, if you are an alcoholic, you will likely make the same mistakes. So what changes are you willing to make?
And DONT beat yourself up. And don't over analyze. In my home group they say there is no section in our big book of AA called "into thinking." And its true. Its into *action.*