If you haven't completed the steps, I would find another sponsor.

I'm curious about the circumstances which require 13 different sponsors.

Yeah. I lost my sponsor 6 months ago. He was my one and only. 13 sounds like a lot. Agree with Yard.

Something always happens. It’s been over a long period. 12 years. No ones ever finished going through the steps with me. The new sponsors always want to start back at the beginning.

yes that is common starting point.....but if nobody is available in person who is what we call a qualified sponsor who has himself taken the 12 steps then there are some people online or at telephone meetings that you can possibly do telephone sponsoring with and internet sponsoring with....

do not feel bad about a bunch of sponsors.....some times we change....sometimes they change.....basically some people get lucky enough to have a lifer who stays with them....like above....and then they die....and suddenly that person needs a new sponsor

I have had a few different sponsors too....I am 24yrs sober....my first sponsor lead me to chose another guy who came in with more time in program and he wanted me to start at step one too.....I did....then we split apart by a large physical move from the Island I got sober on.....Guam....I actually asked another 3rd guy to help me on Guam before I moved too.....but he did not take me thru any steps....we just kept in constant contact.....when I moved back to STL MO from Guam I asked a friend who was a neophite at sponsoring but had solid time and had done steps with his long term sponsor.....he fired me because I would not do the things he suggested I do....I got another sponsor.....the other sponsor took me to step 5 and found out about my owing money large money to my then 90ish year old mother.....he demanded I start paying her back....she did not want the money back.....it was to be given from inherited money.....so I fired him....got a new sponsor.....someone who worked with lots of people but was himself unsponsored.....he retired from the bank VP position that he held after they sold the bank and headed to his lake house in MI which he then told me I needed a different sponsor because he would be gone all summer....I got the current sponsor I have.....this one is an absentee sponsor....he lives in another town....if a full time pastor now after leaving an insurance career.....and is a circuit speaker who travels around to give the talks at conferences and things all around the country.....we do text message 11th step each night.....he sends me his I send him mine.....straight from the big book plus some added questions that we agreed upon as things we wanted to share....

anyway someone out there will hopefully lead you thru all 12 steps.....I personally have had only one sponsee who drank and I fired him.....

I’d start at the beginning. It never hurts.

How long have you been sober? What step are you on?

I have had a couple "temporary sponsors" that worked with me until I fired them. I fired them because I wasn't really ready to work the program. Once I was ready to put forth the necessary work, I worked with my sponsor for about 4-6 months. She guided me through the steps, and once her job was done, we parted ways. I haven't worked with a sponsor for about 12-13 years.

Once you learn how to drive, you don't need a driving instructor with your every time you hit the road. Once you work the steps and learn how to apply the steps to your life, you don't need a sponsor to "guide" you any longer.

You could do the steps without a sponsor. If you have any questions about the steps, you can ask one of us or all of us.

Bob I would never suggest that anyone do the steps without a sponsor.....do you not go to meetings? that is something that is said repeatedly in meetings is that you need a sponsor to help work your way thru the steps.....sorry to disagree....but I strongly disagree....trying to make 9th step amends without a sponsor is a little too risky to even attempt.... I hope you yourself have a sponsor.....hugs bill

I'm sure someone on this site will sponsor you. I think the sponsor emphasis is important, but I also think if you're completely convinced you are an alcoholic, and that AA has a solution in it's book, you can still do the steps. The great news is there are so many speaker tapes, and step studies recorded on the internet, it won't hurt to do the work on your own, eventually the sponsor needs to cut the cord and let you fly on your own too.

I know people who have read the book, and listened to the Joe and Charlie step tapes on youtube, and have done just fine. I think having a sponsor as a guide again is important, but I think a situational event like yours if true shouldn't stop you from trying to do the steps regardless if you have a guide or not. The Big Book says God doesn't make too hard a terms with those who seek him. I also would ask myself why do I see others trying to stay sober as not good sponsors? I know whenever someone asks me to be a sponsor, I have to do some work on my end too, and can't just make up stuff that is relative to the message, so asking someone who is not so good, might be good for them because then they can practice getting better.

Last thing I'll says is God reliance, not sponsor reliance, keeps most drunks sane and sober. If you have faith that God will avail you the right person, that makes the sponsor much easier to work with, but sponsor's aren't perfect, and no human power can relieve alcoholism, like God will and can, so I would caution you to not think that just because you don't have a sponsor, or that the draft pool is weak, don't let that limit your effort and work at being who you want to be in sobriety.

Thanks Yard_Eggs! I like your advice. Was just getting started on the steps again. It’s just been a long time since I went through them. A lot has happened since.

Fredrick,
There are extremely important reasons as to why I don’t have sponsor options right now. Too many to go into, but I do like what Yard_Eggs said, and I like the idea of asking the group if and when I have questions.

I really appreciate everyone’s advice!! They had my sponsor cremated. I don’t know when the memorial will be. His name was Gary. He almost beat some very scary cancer, but a heart attack got him instead last Wednesday.

That’s traumatic but the important thing is to get involved in some action to keep you from drinking. Try to find a few new meetings and just work into new circles. The sponsor will become apparent. 1-2

Bradley, stick with Yard. She is good sobriety. Has been since I joined here.

Bradley,

It's never a bad idea to review the steps, especially if you think there is a specific issue or problem requiring special attention.

If you feel you need a sponsor to help you, my advice is to seek out a person who demonstrates the type of sober life you aspire to. "If you want what we have..." applies to sponsors also.

Thank you so much! I think I will be okay on my own for now. I’ll keep in touch on this site.