Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
This is the first day of what I hope becomes the end of me drinking alcohol. During one of my previous attempts to stop I came up with this list of reasons to stop reminding myself that I was choosing not to drink, just as I had, in the past, chosen to drink.
I dont want to risk losing my wife
Combining alcohol and medication is dangerous
I cannot moderate the amount I consume
I make bad decisions
I forget things Ive done or said
I feel bad the next day for the things Ive done or said
I feel physically bad the next day
Feeling bad makes it difficult to work
I feel more anxious the next day
I want to live a healthier life
I want to be in control - not have alcohol control me
In addition to making notes about my day each morning I plan to document the more productive things that Ive done instead of drinking. I had previously created a list of things I could do at night to occupy my time which including reading and writing as well as working on scanning photos, enhancing old videos, etc. I have done some scanning recently and it felt good to do those things. I like being productive and feel good when I am productive.
I also reminded myself this morning that when I was younger I had stated I would not drink because I didnt want to be hungover and think to myself I did this to myself. In addition to feeling crappy from drinking I also eat crappy food which makes my stomach upset the next morning so I feel additionally crappy because of that.
I had also previously purchased a wrist band that says One Life, One Chance on it. I wore this for a while as a reminder that I only have one chance to live each day and that I want to make the most of each day and that drinking leads to bad things as outlined above. Ive just put that wrist band back on.
Finally, Ive told my wife (again) that I want to stop drinking but, as in the past she is skeptical because I have not yet succeeded in stopping after numerous attempts to stop. The one thing I feel like I have going for me this time is that I gave up Facebook at the beginning of August and Ive stayed off it. Of course I was able to delete my account from Facebook whereas I cant delete alcohol.
Rich
I dont want to risk losing my wife
Combining alcohol and medication is dangerous
I cannot moderate the amount I consume
I make bad decisions
I forget things Ive done or said
I feel bad the next day for the things Ive done or said
I feel physically bad the next day
Feeling bad makes it difficult to work
I feel more anxious the next day
I want to live a healthier life
I want to be in control - not have alcohol control me
In addition to making notes about my day each morning I plan to document the more productive things that Ive done instead of drinking. I had previously created a list of things I could do at night to occupy my time which including reading and writing as well as working on scanning photos, enhancing old videos, etc. I have done some scanning recently and it felt good to do those things. I like being productive and feel good when I am productive.
I also reminded myself this morning that when I was younger I had stated I would not drink because I didnt want to be hungover and think to myself I did this to myself. In addition to feeling crappy from drinking I also eat crappy food which makes my stomach upset the next morning so I feel additionally crappy because of that.
I had also previously purchased a wrist band that says One Life, One Chance on it. I wore this for a while as a reminder that I only have one chance to live each day and that I want to make the most of each day and that drinking leads to bad things as outlined above. Ive just put that wrist band back on.
Finally, Ive told my wife (again) that I want to stop drinking but, as in the past she is skeptical because I have not yet succeeded in stopping after numerous attempts to stop. The one thing I feel like I have going for me this time is that I gave up Facebook at the beginning of August and Ive stayed off it. Of course I was able to delete my account from Facebook whereas I cant delete alcohol.
Rich
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check out that smoke ring. It tasted really good. I smothered it with Maulls BBQ sauce which is Local to St. Louis and one of the best I ever had.....
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I was recently separated from my wife of 33 years and it's complicated. Anyway I rented a room about 15 minutes away and I see my kids about once a week. I see the people who own the house I live in once in a while but other than that I stay in my room where I do my cooking, wash dishes in the shower, read, color, and sleep. I get out at least once a day. I grocery shop and I attend 2 meetings...
To your success!
Robert
That is a great list. You are taking a lot of positive steps to getting and staying sober. I'd like to recommend a book: "The Easy Way to Stop Drinking," by Allen Carr. many of us have found it helpful.
Check out the reviews:
http://www.amazon.com/The-Easy-Way-Stop-Drinking/dp/1402736479
I don't blame your wife for being skeptical. The only way to gain her trust on this is to stay sober. You CAN do this.
Thanks for your replies and support.
I have read Allen Carr's book and I was thinking about it this morning - mostly the idea that alcohol is poison.
Rich
This is my 5th or 6th attempt although my first since April or May.
I think the longest I've gone previously was 11 days and then 9 right after that.
Maybe to make it run more smoothly with the wife, instead of telling her your quitting alcohol, just do it. Then down the road, maybe you can say something like "babe, have U noticed I haven't had a drink in a month" (something like that)... I bet she will say something to U before that though...
U can't keep crying wolf to her, just do it...
U don't have to be a slave to alcohol... It's all in your hands...
Don't be upset, this is the day for positive change...
Thanks for the feedback. I have resisted AA so far because I live in a pretty small town and am concerned about seeing people I know. I understand the idea of "anonymous" but it is still a concern.
The biggest thing for me is breaking the routines that lead to me drinking. Mostly its at home watching TV but of course socially its "expected" but I can break those routines by bringing seltzer with me so I have that available to drink.
Rich
I heard this back when I was in a treatment program and the counselors drilled it into out heads!
Rich, you sound like you are taking a proactive approach. You are not drowning yourself in self pity. You know what the problem is and you are taking some concrete steps to fix it. You know what your triggers are and how to avoid them!
This is the first day of the rest of your life! Remember this day, every day because it is your sobriety date. On October 16th, 2016, we will have a big party for you, IF you stay sober and I really believe you will do it this time!
God Bless!
I dont want to risk losing my husband & kids
I cannot moderate the amount I consume
I make bad decisions
I forget things Ive done or said
I feel bad the next day for the things Ive done or said
I feel physically bad the next day
I feel more anxious the next day
I haven't yet told my husband I'm quitting again ... I've disappointed him all the other times, I can't bear to disappoint him again. You'd think that would be enough motivation to quit - but as you know, it's so much easier said than done.
Good luck! I'll check in on you on our Day 2.
I found my biggest motivator is the reduction in my anxiety... I did not realize how much alcohol was "causing" it - not helping... I slipped a couple of times when I first started and I remember the drastic difference in my anxiety ... so be anxious and having to take extra xanex the next day... so yucky! be strong... good luck... never loose hope.
I gained my family's trust back by staying sober.
Now they have left the house in my care and even left cash for groceries and maintenance. If someone told me that would happen a year earlier, I would have chuffed, "Yeah right--good one."
See I couldn't learn what I didn't know. Besides I was a isolationist and aa helped me to learn to communicate again.
Good luck and for me in early times it was important to make a decision, even if it wasn't the best decision or the right decision, making a decision to take action was better than being frozen in fear
1-2
Believe it or not, this may be the best thing for you - seeing other people you know and having an instant bond for life, that struggle with alcohol.
You've tried 5 times in 9 months, and deleting Facebook is not a program of recovery. Embrace AA. Go to the next town, but my guess is you'll find someone there running from home, just like you.
I remember the first time i saw someone I knew at AA. I instantly felt a kinship with them, and they were a person that I didn't have much regard for. Aside from saying hello, we've never spoken about AA or alcohol.
If you want sobriety, something must change. It's not like a diet, where you can yo-yo on and off. You need to be ready to be all-in.