Just remember, "except when to do so would injure them or others." Sometimes we are dying to get something off our chests when it ends up deeply hurting the other person. I think this is were a good sponsor comes in.

Luckily for me, the amends I needed to make were welcomed and worked out well.

Good luck!

who, I did talk to my sponser and he said I was right not to say anything at this point in time

Step 9 is where it's at for a reason. By the time we reach step nine we have should be at ease with ourselves. It take a big man to admit his shortcomings face to face with the one we had harmed.The key to that sucess is having completely forgiven ourselves and knowing that this is something God would have you do. If you're not feeling comfortable at this stage of your sobriety perhaps going over steps6&7 might be helpful. Not only do we ask God for the guidance to see our shortcomings we ask him for the power to do something about them.

Here is my story. I was in a relationship in which we both drank heavily. One day over shortly before Memorial Day we got into a fight. She put her hands around my throat and started choking me. I knocked her hands away. She then went into the bedroom. I came in about 30 minutes later to find her passed out. I say a bottle of Valium next to her on the night stand. It was full. When I left it was empty. 20 minutes later I had a neighbor who was a paramedic looking at her and calling 911. She almost died. I told everyone she try to commit suicide. They locked her up in a mental ward in DC for 30 days.
To make a long story short, I wondered after getting sober a month later how to make direct amends. But before I could she left and I moved. Over 20 years passed. During that time I did not see our son. I tried, in Step 8, to become willing. That is the key to Step 9. Step 8. Becoming willing to make those amends. In 2004 I appeared on the Montel Williams Show in New York City to be reunited with my son. His mother was there. I just started talking about that night and she informs me she took a bottle of anti-depressants she had. I just added to the problem. Though she was surprised at my actions she thanked me for saving her life. So that is my story. Hope it helps. By the way, she and I are good friends today though she lives in California and I in Connecticut. Our son is in Syracuse.

nice story Happy and thankyou all for your input. Very much appreciated!

TC!

I was adamant in my head that I wanted to do a certain amends. Yet something wasn't feeling right.

I spoke to my sponsor about it and we have left it on the back burner. When the time is right, HP will let me know.

If it doesn't feel right then it probably isn't right at that particular time.

I took 38 years causing hurt and pain, not all amends have to be done in my time. I ask HP for guidance.

I'm not sure what kind of story you're lookin for Bob. Like a happy, feel good outcome from an amends that wasn't expected to go well?

I think the hardest for me was admitting that I had deceived the person I was closest to. I had a lie that I had kept from them for a matter of years and it wasn't just 1 lie, it was a continuous lie and it felt horrid. I can't even really classify it as a "lie" because it was pure 100% deceitful! Like pretending to be someone that I wasn't....it was pretty big.

I expected the worst and the response was nothing as I thought it would be. My apology was accepted and I was forgiven and we are closer today than we were. :)