What did you get sober for?

I say, thank God you're sober for this. Stick with it.

Whoever said that life is fair was greatly deluded in my opinion. Things that don't seem fair do happen. And shit things do happen to good people also.

Did you have a contract? Is there any recourse available to you in terms of unfair dismissal etc?

If there is no action that you can take then I guess it will come down to acceptance and to looking forward to what you can do now. Easy to say, not so easy to do. Acceptance always takes time for me and I go through stages such as anger and fear before I get there.

Nor did i , but in-spite of many , seemingly un-just happenings I've remained sober,,,, Which was as i had hoped it could be...hell in a hand - basket had become just a little more than tolerable ... but Not by much .....Reach deep Andrew.
Billy

That's difficult Andrew. I am glad you are sober and I hope you can find many other things to be grateful for. Sobriety is the most important thing. Everything else will work out. I know there are some pending changes to how preexisting conditions are treated with regard to insurance. Get cobra in the meantime - it will continue with the same coverage. It's a bit expensive but hopefully you will also qualify for unemployment. If I were u, I might even inquire about a lawsuit. I'm not sure they can just let you go like that.

I wish you better days.

Hugs

I am one of those people whose life got better in terms of the removal of all the destructive patterns of drinking when I got sober 11 years ago, but who has also dealt with illness I never could have dreamed of in recovery, that has literally destroyed my life. It is said in AA (paraphrasing) that any dream you have in early recovery will pale into insignificance to the amazing dream fullfullment you will have over time if you stay sober. That is simply not true for everyone.

Some people get a better deal than others. Some get to live out their dreams and some have to simply survive whatever calamity comes their way - and for me it has been for years and years. My life has unfolded in the extreme end of the spectrum in terms of difficulty. Yes, I have to be honest, I am very pissed off by that.

But nevertheless, I am 100% grateful to have gotten sober and stayed sober from Day One 11 years ago. It is a life destroying illness and I am amazed, considering the huge burden of alcoholism and the many, many deaths in my family from the disease, that I DID IT, I got sober and stayed sober.

It's REALLY important to separate out the intrinsic good of being sober from your other life problems. It will help your general mental health and it will help you to deal with you health/employment/financial issues.

Start a Gratitude list and work on it every single day and I promise it will help you. Do a whole new list every day. Somedays you will repeat what has gone before, some day there will be new things, but if you make an effort in this direction, it will maximise your positive thinking.

Acceptance can feel impossible especially if we have a huge dark cloud of resentment covering us. Don't misunderstand, you have every right to be pissed, hurt, scared... You certainly don't have to think that what has happened to you is acceptable but I promise you that once you accept that it has happened and that you had no control over what has happened..........that "it is what it is", you will be able to think more clearly and find some relief.

I know this is freaking you out right now but you can't give up hope or freeze up. You have to take action and move forward.

Nicky mentioned recourse for unfair dismissal/wrongful termination... Check out your legal rights.

HTL mentioned "Cobra" insurance which everyone is eligible for after they lose a job. It is expensive but it might be the best option at this time until you become insured again with a new and more affordable policy in the future. If at all possible, at least the worry of "preexisting" illness will be gone.

Andrew, your being SOBER is what is going to get you through this.

You can get through all of this sober and sane. Stay connected here and in recovery. Try also to surrender all of these troubles to your HP and have faith that you don't have to go through any of this alone.

It's going to be ok!

Peace and prayers

I left my place of employment for a year to get well from illness JA and It is tough. Life dosn't seem fair sometimes. At the end of chemo I even started screaming at God "I've had enough, I heard you already, give me a break" lol. Hope he heard me, all clear so far. And I hope and pray your tests will be positive news too.

I agree with the above with regards to the legwork. Write and ask them why it wasn't working out and what you can do to improve for future employment. That might also give you something in black and white if you do find you have legal recourse. Life throws us some tall hurdles sometimes JA, but they can be overcome. Faith and works.

Hey Andrew - I agree with dreamingtrees. Being sober is what's going to get you through this. I am 18 days sober today. On day #2 I was told i was being laid off and I was. I already have a difficult time paying for insurance and meds. WTF - what am I going to do now. Hubby is in heart failure - no meds and he dies. That simple. BUT.....I know this......if I was still drinking when this happened I would NOT been able to handle it. I would have crawled into the bottle, feel sorry for myself and do nothing about it. Sober I'm proactive in my job search and just think if I get an interview my mind will be sharp instead of mush.

Hey, they sound like a crappy employer anyway if their practice is to fire people without warning or giving a reason. Might turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to you.

It would be so much worse if you weren't -- hang tough, man! You'll be so happy you did!

Thank you



Resentments can burn like a brain fever!

I've seen people come through all sorts of things in recovery -- liver transplants, cancer, loss of a child ... I am sure it wasn't fun for them ... but always real.

Did you check into COBRA like I said days ago???

They sure can burn JA, and the person most hurt by resentments is ourselves. Sometimes it's best to let go and move on through the next door opening. That's been my experience mate. Always something new beyond. :)

your no different from many others out there losing their employment, insurance, etc.

What were your expectations of sobriety? Sobriety doesn't mean a life of perfection, it doesn't mean you aren't going to have bumps in the road -

Further - you have to remember too - just because you were fired doesn't mean you can't COBRA out - i understand and read your other posts about the expense, I know BUT nonetheless it is an option.

So now you take the fact that you were fired, and lost insurance and you apply for state insurance or county insurance, however it is available where you live - it is a process of aggravation and frustration, but it's also part of life.

If your illness including alcoholism is under a term of disability then you need to talk to social security office about temporary disability which will also supplement with health care.

You need to take action in this just as you took action to get sober - whining solves nothing - I understand where you are coming from, as I've lived my entire adult life with no insurance coverage, I have to fight and fight to maintain state insurance for my children, one being autistic -

Also remember, employers ARE NOT required to provide health insurance as a "perk" of employment - it's already rumoring around that many employers are going to start making employees pay for the coverage, be it all or half, etc.

If you think you were wrongfully terminated, then speak to your unemployment office and or seek out legal counsel - there are many pro se counsel, unless you take action, no one else will. Are you 100% sure that it was just over illness? I mean missing work - even with doctors excuses is a very good reason for termination - illness or not - many companies who have the ability to offer health care, many times have a regulated number of sick days, vacation days, and if fortunate enough sick leave - if your company didn't offer this to begin with then missing work excessive number of days for whatever the reason is grounds for termination - if they did offer this and your days missed exceeded those days - then that is grounds, if your illness is affecting work performance then it too is grounds for termination - and by not being at work affects work performance, just for an example.

Look at the big broad picture of this - we all here just get bits and pieces of things as we share with others what we want them to know.

But if you really feel you were terminated unfairly then take action -

in the meantime - big hugs, prayers and lots of luck for strength- dont let this be an excuse for falling off the wagon.

Peace!

JA -
They laid you off or fired you? There is a vast difference between the two in benefits and avenues of recourse you have...