New Folk here. I really had not thought about a special "holiday" strategy yet. I am so new at this, I had not even gotten that far. Just admitted to myself that I have a problem. I hadn't even gotten as far as being "dry" over the holidays. Clearly, I have a lot of work to do.
Thanks for your post. I have some thinking to do.

Hey Need. At this point in your sobriety, I would keep your strategy very simple. Get a sponsor. It's amazing how much knowledge and compassion a sponsor can have. A good one will get you through the holidays and beyond so that you can have the happiness you deserve. Don't worry about some elaborate plan at this point. My advice for you is simple...don't drink today, get a sponsor, listen to your sponsor. Hang in there.

Hello wecanbehappy,

As a relative old-timer I do not have a holiday strategy as such and I will tell you the reasons for that.

First of all, when it finally dawned on me that I had lost control over alcohol I knew that the game was up and that there could be no going back. My problem then was that I was unable to stay sober for more than a few days. After reluctantly accepting that I could not do it on my own I went to AA meetings that is where I developed a strategy that has worked for all times of the year.

I realize that the holiday season is a time of danger for many and you are wise to have something in place. One thing that always works is taking the focus off yourself by helping other people. That can be something as simple as calling another alcoholic or getting involved in volunteer work in the community. I think that if it was still early days for me that I would avoid the parties as well as the bar but thats just me. Maybe I am reading something into your post that is not there and apologies if I am, but I fear that in your own mind you may (possibly without knowing it) be planning to drink over the holiday season. Bear in mind that a couple of drinks that you see other people taking can lead you back to a downward spiral of continuous drinking. There is a little book called Living Sober that is full of short tips for dealing with different situations. It should be available at some AA meetings.

Needhelp4me2quit, you are welcome to the forum. When I quit drinking I was advised not to plan too far ahead. It was suggested that I did not take a drink TODAY and before long the sober days were mounting up.

Its a bit early yet but here is wishing everyone a happy and sober holiday season.

I love the holidays nowadays. In fact, I'm wrapping presents today. I stopped drinking on Oct 16, 1992. Right before the holidays. I stayed sober despite myself. I did that by going to many AA meetings, getting a sponsor and beginning the Steps.

My sponsor also had me going on 12th Step calls which also kept me busy. Before long, instead of thinking of a drink daily, I was going months and now years without the thought that a drink would be a step up.

Find some women in your group who are worse off and get to know them. I can't think of me when I'm helping someone else. Make new memories with family where you will actually remember them.

And like PJ said, be mindful of your thoughts. I can't control the thoughts that come into my mind but I can control what I allow to remain.

Hugs,

Dianna

Hey PJ. Great advice. I know it's tough to get the right context to postings. I'm not the best writer. I really am not going to drink over the holidays. I guess my point is just that it's a danger zone. I was sober for 7 years and relapsed during Christmas. I just need to make sure I never let my guard down during the holidays ever again..........I love being sober way too much.

Here's the thing I've found, keep both eyes open wide, attend to your hunches related to your own insides ,as the more one resist's something left unattended on the insides the stronger the resistance comes and the less in touch you are to yourself and your fellow man..

I got sober on December 17th of 1985 . Christmas Eve found me in West Palm Beach at my cousin Joyce's house. I attended the Alkathon at 4th street (the Triangle Club).... New Years eve I thought a little weed at the AA dance might be appropriate , six months later I realized weed and my sooobriety were not a way to remain honest on my inside's .tt was then after six months of being sooober and doing a lot of meetings, fellowship and reading most of AA's literature and other things I became thirsty for a life more directed towards w hat I mentioned in the beginning of this post. That was sooo many years ago buttt it always reminds me of this song:)))

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IwIzcNLOogc

I had to begin to become a active participant in my own life and involve others in it and then magic became something I could
count on " No matter" th e challenges I encounter Sneakiness is what I encounter when I'm not paying attention and expect Me to always be honest with Me Emotionally :))

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IwIzcNLOogc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GmfWSQspSo4

It was the holiday cheer that broke my longest sobriety attempt.
I am keeping it very low-key and completely steering clear of drinkers.
I am only day 51 so I am still fragile. :)
Thanksgiving I am volunteering at a mission; I think it will be good for my character, my faith and certainly my sobriety.
Christmas...stay home and contemplate on what that special day is REALLY all about.

I am an alcoholic, but never drank much around holidays. It just wasn't something I did. I don't have a strategy, because really, I am not even thinking holidays = drinking. I am more so worried about this 20 pounds I put on March, and how to avoid the food that I want to eat. But I do understand that for most of the world. we are coming upon a time where people drink alcohol, and lots of it. Especially for New Years. I actually will be working most of my holiday time this year as well, keeping me busy and away from cookies and spiked egg nog.

Everyone, including non-alcoholics, tend to want to drink more during the holidays. This may be due to:

1) They are spending money they don't have, and want to numb themselves to the reality of what they are doing to themselves financially, as well as the guilt that they are not spending enough
2) They are stressed out by all the hustle and bustle, the exact opposite of brotherly-love commonly exhibited, and all the extra things they have to get done by a tight deadline
3) Many people are alone; others don't get along with their families but feel they have to be around them for the holidays. Hard to deal with either problem sober at this time of year, which is family-oriented to an almost nauseating degree.
4) Christmas music everywhere, same songs over and over and over.
5) Many people's jobs push them to work harder to make up for the time all the employees will have off soon, and/or because they are a consumer-based business and busier this time of year.
6) Christmas parties where everyone else is drinking, and it seems like you are expected to drink with them or you're not truly "celebrating".

Whatever your reasons (mine are mainly the first three), decide to cut back on the things that are leading you to drink as much as you possibly can. Even if it means putting yourself on a budget. Even if it means not spending much time with your family. Avoiding malls and stores, and buying gifts online. Stands to reason you'll feel less urgency to drink if you avoid the things that trigger you. It works for me.

PS: Christmas sucks; getting drunk doesn't make it any better though.

One of the things I heard was about the HALTS and this meant
Do not get too Hungry
Do not get too Angry
Do not get too Lonely
Do not get too Tired
Do not get too Serious.

At parties always have a drink in your hand even if water, if your host sees a drink in your hand they will not feel obliged to offer you a drink. This also minimise having to explain why you do not want an alcoholic drink especially early on.

Always, ALWAYS have your own means of leaving never rely on others in case it gets too much and you want to leave. Never put yourself in a position of feeling trapped.

Hope others can suggest more

Wishing you the best G8