Yes I too drank to cope. I had no coping skills so I used booze as my mechanism

The way I found to rid myself of the dependence was to learn some skills. And I couldn't learn alone. I go to a room and we chat about what's making me want to drink and therefore take away the need to drink over the stress that comes my way.

The minute I began to understand that alcohol was just a symptom I started to heal.

What was the stress situation? Want to share?

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I was abused as a child by my half brother, my mother knew about it (denied it) and didn't stop it. I have been to therapy for a number of years to learn coping skills, but they have never sunk in for me I guess. My relationship with my mother is strained, but I am civil towards her, but for some reason I just couldn't stand her last night. I have been a little testy since my previous last drink last weekend, so I know that didn't help. She brought him up in conversation last night and I LOST IT. He has been to prison for his crimes but I think my mom still doesn't believe he did anything wrong. I just didn't want to be in her presence and I started having flashbacks and hurried home. I drank to make it all stop.

I actually didn't have a plan to stop drinking. I could not picture a life without alcohol. I was just so tired and desperate that I poured out the drink I was drinking because I just didn't want to drink for that second. That second turned to a minute and a minute turned into an hour and so on. Don't focus so much on the big picture, it is too much pressure. Just try to get through a hour then another. You are stronger than you may believe.

I remember a guy who used to relapse constantly. He announced he drank because his uncle died. An old timer asked,"How's your uncle now ?"
Perhaps crude, but what we don't get, is that we don't drink 'over' anything, we drink 'at' things. We are a self-centered lot and when things don't go our way, we have tantrums. That's all. Drinking brings no resolution because it does not change the dynamic of the excuse.

It sux....trying....drinking...trying...drinking...so depressing.

Its really courageous to post that you drank.....you could have kept tight lipped and that wouldn't have helped you at all.

Sometimes hearing these things...people say...excuses...etc...make me angry when I relapse.....You know why you drank...cause you wanted to...cause you had cravings...because it was easier.

Numbing feels good...its the despair that we feel afterward that stings so bad....What I would want to hear right now is:

Its ok...glad you came in and posted about how hideous and sneaky a craving can be....thankful to hear that I'm not the only one who makes mistakes or gets weak when it comes to certain situations.

Thank God you didn't overdose, kill someone, get a DUI, end up in jail or hospital.

As long as your breathing...you still have a chance. And here we are.....just keep trying

Go forward, as its the only way. Don't look back and don't beat yourself up. However, don't expect a damn thing to change until you are ready to make dramatic changes. For me that was going to AA. that was the huge act of acceptance for me that allowed everything else to happen.