hi, i dont do steps but i do write a lot about everything and anything, its theraputic to me,
Sounds like its a life story you are doing!
i would like to do one of those one day.
But if thought had to, think it would be too much for me at moment,
May do it when 10 years clean and sober, will have insight by then hopefully.
lots of hugs x

i agree with lou7 ido the same hon:O))

I used to share that it took me a year to do my step 4 but that wasnt actually true. It was a year of saying I was doing step 4 whan actually I should have been saying I wasnt doing step4.

When I got desperate enough and couldnt stand the way I was feeling anymore, I finally turned my will and life over to a Power greater than myself and then did my step4 in a few hours. The relief was huge and it also lead to release because in reality it was the first action I had taken to change myself and progress my recovery.

I give my sponsees two to three weeks to complete step 4 and talk to them a lot while they are doing it to make sure we follow the instructions in the book exactly.

I think letting it go on much longer than that is cruel because it is a horrible place to be living in the past and living in the problem and it is delaying access to the rest of the program and therefore the solution.

I was worried when I was doing mine that i wouldnt get everything down but it wasnt really a valid worry. Remember the point of step 4 is to discover your defects of character so that you know what you are asking for in steps 6 and 7 so as long as you have enough on your step 4 to reveal that you have enough. Also anything missed off will get picked up in steps 10 and 11.

I always tell my sponsees that if there is anything they purposefully miss off that they are aware of then that is not good but they dont have to wait until they believe that every single unremembered thing has been remembered before they can say they have done it.

i agree with nicky. i procrastinated but when i actually sat down and did it it only took 3-4 hours. i had many starts but then i'd put it away for another month or so. fear, i guess. finally, i just did it. just keep it the way it's outlined in the book and you'll do fine. you can google the 4th step online if you need some help about how to do it.

my sponsor told me "it takes as long as it takes" and it differs from each person. this is a life long change theres no rush, depending on how thorough u want to be. i know people who do 4th steps each yr. this is not a "time limit" process. i my self am doing one step a yr, of course i touch on each step daily, however my sponsor wants me to write everything out, so i figure it took me almost 20 yrs to want to get sober i wont do all the steps over night. as long as u dont pick up, that is the main objection. when a resentment or an accomplishment needs to be noticed i notice it , however as for my past i deal with it as it comes up and ill get it all out in my foruth yr of soberity. and i am sure still then it wont ALL COME OUT. good luck and keep up the good work.

I can't find anything in the Big Book that mentions a specific time frame in the 4th step paragraphs.

I have done 4th steps in as little as 1 day and as long as 1 month. I would, in my opinion, say 1 day is too short and 1 month is too long.

You guys are all so awesome :) Thank you so much for your feedback, it is greatly appreciated