I believe my parents are alcoholic but it is not my place to confirm that (my sponsor speaks good advice). All I can do is transfer some of my knowledge and it is up to them to come to their own decision and reach out if they desire. I now know why 'tough love' has the word tough in front.

Would we/did we listen when others talked to us? I think not.

Depends on the circumstances!

Normally, as an individual, we need to offer hope and a possible direction, but seldom 'force'.

However, that being said, if you are judge, police officer, counselor, or clergy man - it can be a little bit different - if you hold a person accountable for their actions and that appears to feel like force - so be it!

Think about this: Almost every force can be viewed as a support! So, if you are upholding the law, got the 'purse strings' or housing someone, you may in fact have the kind of 'force' that can help - mind you, it can blow up and be a fiasco.

But if you are talking about trying to force a friend or co-worker - you probably ought to STOP and say a prayer before becoming an un-listened to pest!

Suggestions, and pointing them in the right direction, are what I would suggest. An active Alcoholic screams out for help every time he/she drinks, but they have to learn to accept help. When sobriety is mentioned, they see it as a threat. A threat to the negative Alcoholic reality they live in. The more you push recovery, the more they reinforce their Alcoholic reality. If they want to stop eventually, they can use the suggestions and pointers to take the first steps to recovery.

My sisters expressed their concerns but I wasn't ready to accept it, until I was ready to accept it!!

Alcoholics make excuses "I only had 3 drinks" meaning 9 shots of straight liquor...until the person realizes they have lost control, they are not receptive to help. Only you can fix yourself no matter how much others want to fix you.

But I will admit, it caught my attention when others noticed it and mentioned it to me. Never hurts to mention it, but no alcoholic will accept it if it's being force fed. That's something you have to figure out for yourself.

Personally I believe that it is best to be a positive example of sobriety so that if they want help they know who to come to.

Trying to force this on anyone is a waste of energy. I am a firm believer of the power of example. You could express concern, you could offer yourself for help, but the decision needs to be made by the drunk or all efforts are futile.

You can't force it. YOu can let them know that you are aware of the fact that they have a problem, but if they are intent to keep on drinking, then that is what that person will do. I did not begin to quit until I was cornered and my back was against the wall.

Then I finally wanted it- and you really have to WANT to quit.

Thanks for this post.
Its really strange how things happen in life. At least for me. I was a active drunk for many yrs. My kids wouldnt have much to do with me right before I got sober. Now almost 2 yrs sober my daughter, I hope has hit her bottom. Her children taken from her, shes been arrested,no job, and so forth.
We all have tried to help. But as I remember, I hated when others told me I had a problem. I already knew that. I hated when I went to a meeting. I hated when they all knew what I needed to do.
But... it wasnt going to work till I was ready to work it. And as we all know that have been there and still going thru it. Sometimes it takes loosing everything to realize that its time to seek help.
No it cant be forced. And its so sad to watch. All I can do now is pray.

lol, you can't force sobriety on anyone, we have a saying in AA, it's not for people who NEED it but for people who want it. I have found that to be true, you try to force sobriety you just push even further into the grips of the disease.Actually if someone want's to drink it is non of our business, all we can do is pray for them, that they make it into some type of sane living.

It's up to the person to decide whether they are alcoholic or not.

Intervention by family and friends can help but it is still up to the addict to make a decision.

I think you can encourage, neve impose, and always advice when asked.

You can always tell the alcoholic......but you can't tell them much

'when anyone, anywhere reaches out for help' - it's like that for a reason, to try to talk to people when they aren't yet ready to quit might prejudice them against AA for good.