Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
Or should I say, nightmares.. Every 3 or 4 days or so, I have a dream in which I knowingly take a few sips of a drink with alcohol... I only drink a few ounces, and then a huge wave of dissappointment washes over me... I am sick and disheartened and disgusted at myself, so much so that I can barely pull myself out of the sleep... And when I finally do wake up, the RELIEF is equally huge, the joy at finding out that it was only a dream, that I still have my sobriety, I still have all that I've worked for, I still have a chance at The Good Life... I want to jump up and yell, OKAY! ALRIGHT! I GET IT! ENOUGH WITH THE DREAMS ALREADY!!! Because I never want to feel that disappointment in myself again, for any reason. I will move MOUNTAINS not to feel that again...
I just passed the 6 month mark this week. Milestones can be good and bad. Because you tend to look at the state of your life at a Milestone, it's like a State Of Your Life Address thing, and if your life is still as f*$%'ed up as it was when you were drinking, you can tend to say "What the HELL, I may as well still be drinking!" Dangerous waters, there... I had that ridiculous thought. And then I said, f%^$ that sh%t, and got on with the projects at hand, the things that are dragging me down, mainly my grown/growing children and the stupid decisions they're making and the stupidity they seem to be chasing and just the general all-around STUPIDNESS, did I mention THE STUPENDOUS STUPIDITY???!!!!
There. I feel better. About myself, not about my stupid progeny...
The State Of My Life Address: My life is infinitely improved over 6 months ago. The things that are f#$%'d up in my life, they would be f#$%'d up regardless of me drinking or not. But at least I can deal with them soberly, and maturely now, with a clear head and all my heart. That is the true State Of My Life. I have focus, I have resources, and I have peace. In the midst of all this chaos. And, did I mention, the STUPIDITY?!!!!
I just passed the 6 month mark this week. Milestones can be good and bad. Because you tend to look at the state of your life at a Milestone, it's like a State Of Your Life Address thing, and if your life is still as f*$%'ed up as it was when you were drinking, you can tend to say "What the HELL, I may as well still be drinking!" Dangerous waters, there... I had that ridiculous thought. And then I said, f%^$ that sh%t, and got on with the projects at hand, the things that are dragging me down, mainly my grown/growing children and the stupid decisions they're making and the stupidity they seem to be chasing and just the general all-around STUPIDNESS, did I mention THE STUPENDOUS STUPIDITY???!!!!
There. I feel better. About myself, not about my stupid progeny...
The State Of My Life Address: My life is infinitely improved over 6 months ago. The things that are f#$%'d up in my life, they would be f#$%'d up regardless of me drinking or not. But at least I can deal with them soberly, and maturely now, with a clear head and all my heart. That is the true State Of My Life. I have focus, I have resources, and I have peace. In the midst of all this chaos. And, did I mention, the STUPIDITY?!!!!
Now I have 17 months and last night, I dreamed that a truck load of Fosters beer (my fav) barreled up to my house and skidded sideways into my driveway, flinging open the back and magically filling my fridge with beer and I was instantly drunk...although I don't remember drinking.
It's just dreams...no worries. You're doing great.
I had a dream the other night that I was abducted by this man who took me to his home to hold me captive. He and his wife had planned it all out and told me the horrible things they would do to me. I escaped and got help and was telling everyone that thank God I was sober now because had I been drinking, I would not have been smart enough and equipped to escape... I awoke scared but once I thought about it, this dream meant freedom from being held captive from the alcohol.
So even bad dreams can be good!