Hi Been! Welcome to the group!

Yes that's very common.

It helps to have an ongoing group to talk about these things so if DS works for you, then keep coming back....AA meetings are another good choice.

It's very possible your bipolar might have somethng to do with the cravings but even bipolor is triggered by something but always diagnosed as hereditary.

By the way, we have a bipolar group here as well and I recommend joining that group if you haven't already.

Alcoholism is a struggle, especially if you have less then 6 months sobriety but if you post in your support groups, send out friend requests who will offer words of support when you journal, then that will go a long way toward giving you the emotional strength you need to keep the plug in the jug.

Good luck on your road to recovery. May you find peace and happiness along the way.

God Bless

100 percent not consistent. Stress leads me back to it and then I wonder why I'm so depressed.

I think it varies from individual to individual, some people go up and down with drinking, and others stay sober.
For me personally, I make a concentrated effort every morning and night to thank myself for staying sober & take it one day at a time.
Every now and then I have a drinking thought, I then go and do something to keep busy or remember how bad it got and that I don't want to go back to the hell that my life was.
You do what works for you whether it be meditation, walking, AA, support groups, you keep looking until you find what helps you stay sober. Take care.

Yes, we all struggle from that. It's really hard. That thought keeps creeping in especially when under stress or a certain trigger. But thoughts are not facts and one shouldn't always entertain thoughts. I, myself have those thoughts here and there and I always remind myself how I felt when I drank. The embarrassment it caused me the next day and the anxiety afterwards. Keep distracting yourself with something positive. Believe me it's not easy at all but you have to push. Just today I had a craving but I asked myself 'Is it worth it, I remembered the last time I acted which almost caused me my death' so no to the craving. Instead I logged on DS to get some motivation. Hope you feel better and wish you all the best. A

I had a habit of drinking too much and then stopping and then would start back because I didn’t have a plan. I was simply undisciplined and once I decided to deal with my alcoholism and not just stop drinking I was able to finally maintain sober.

I highly suggest taking out your dirty laundry and getting it clean not just stuffing it down further in the basket. Only when I opened up and cleaned house was I content with sober

Some good comments already so I’ll just add that yes, cravings can pop up from time to time, regardless of the length of your sobriety. After five years I’ve come to use these moments as reminders for why I choose to remain sober, rather than fear the pitfall of drunkenness. Welcome to our group!

My experience has been a rare one, I think. I was injured almost 5 years ago (not alcohol related) It took quite a while to recover and there were a lot of moments of full mid life crisis. I saw very quickly that my mind wasn't in a good place and KNEW that I couldn't drink anymore. Of course, after years of drinking and avoiding responsibility, reality came roaring in and I had to dig deep to accept things as they were. A LOT of fear came up and I believe this intensity just burned out my desire to 'check out' with a drink (or 5). Somehow I finally got the message that the only way to peace is to go right through my fear. As I slowly found the ground again I'm so thankful to feel sane that I have absolutely no desire to go back to my old ways.
However I have learned to be honest with myself and this is different than my old self. I'm very aware now when anxiety or feelings of unworthiness appear so I am learning that the real consistency is in maintaining mental health. I have joined the human race by accepting that I'm simple and ordinary and this gives me an immense peace. The complicated story of me continues to lessen in importance to just flowing with life. I continue to see that being thankful everyday just to be alive is real grace. This is where we know it's enough exactly as it is. I think it's the arguing with what is that makes us feel that something is lacking. If only such and such were different, I'd be happy.... endlesss spiral, ugh!
It all comes down to honesty in my opinion. And the journey is seeing that every level of honesty with ourselves leads to a deeper honesty....
When you crave a drink, look closely at the behavior; what is it that you don't want to face? Ask it out loud to yourself with full sincerity and I bet you'll know the answer. Then rinse and repeat.