Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
Hi everyone,
Went back to old habits after Thanksgiving. Still 50/50 drinking/sober days.
Went to Smart Recovery hoping I would get the answer WHY I drink.
All is right just did not sink in for long. I am afraid as shit to abuse again even after long periods of abstinence. You know, being sober lets me forget the crap after a while and when real challenge gets in I am completely unprepared. Old circuits stain in my brain and hits me even after months of sobriety, did not have any real rushes in between.
I am not sure I can make it permanent. I do not drink much (about 3/4 of a pint of liqueur per day) and my problem is that my family does not like it (you will ask why, unavailable for the family matters at those times I guess) and I do not like it either but still) CANNOT quit it. I do not get drunk, had only one blackout for nearly 20 year of drinking experience, and I barely make serious problems (close to but not yet). Looks like I can go like that forever. Sometimes I flatter myself that I am the lucky one to get the balance right! But I still want to quit. What do you think? Anyone like me there?
Went back to old habits after Thanksgiving. Still 50/50 drinking/sober days.
Went to Smart Recovery hoping I would get the answer WHY I drink.
All is right just did not sink in for long. I am afraid as shit to abuse again even after long periods of abstinence. You know, being sober lets me forget the crap after a while and when real challenge gets in I am completely unprepared. Old circuits stain in my brain and hits me even after months of sobriety, did not have any real rushes in between.
I am not sure I can make it permanent. I do not drink much (about 3/4 of a pint of liqueur per day) and my problem is that my family does not like it (you will ask why, unavailable for the family matters at those times I guess) and I do not like it either but still) CANNOT quit it. I do not get drunk, had only one blackout for nearly 20 year of drinking experience, and I barely make serious problems (close to but not yet). Looks like I can go like that forever. Sometimes I flatter myself that I am the lucky one to get the balance right! But I still want to quit. What do you think? Anyone like me there?
We come from two different angles though as you consider your drinking a habit and I consider myself an alcoholic. One thing we have in common - thinking that the drinking is essential on a personal level and unable to envisage permanent sobriety.
I can only share my own experience of what happened beyond that point. My drinking got worse. Finally I came out of the delusion that I could stop if I really wanted to and that galvanised me into action to seek whatever it took to ensure I need never drink again.
So if you really find a true desire for sobriety in and of itself there is plenty of help available as you are already aware. While I thought I was managing my drinking pretty well (I wasn't) there was no way I was going to do what it took to get sober. That's my experience anyway.
Lots of good things talked about in Smart...I think its more about how to NOT drink than finding out why you did.
Most important thing for me was finding somewhere with a nit of Hope...some proof there was a way out of the hole I was digging.
P
Please get honest with yourself and I'd suggest AA
I like your description, Borderline drunk not for real as it reminds me of my own drinking. I started off drinking like you are now but sometimes I would go way overboard and drink a lot. Then I learned to be borderline drunk but the only problem was that I was like that almost all day, every day. You may find that you are moving in that direction too unless you do something to address the problem.
What I did when all else failed was to go to meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous. I disagreed with most of what I heard at AA, believed it would not work and even thought that I could help them to do things better, L.O.L. but I kept going to meetings. At some point it hit me that I should copy what those people who were sober for a long time and enjoying life had done. I did that and have not felt like taking a drink for a long time.