I'm curious... how many of you had parents who struggled with alcoholism?
My parents were addicts. While my mom's addiction through my childhood was drugs, not alcohol, my dad was most definitely an alcoholic. When I was young, my dad won full custody of us (my siblings and I) and we saw my mother only rarely.
Looking back now, I get it. I get that my dad was in his early 30's, trying to raise young children on his own, not knowing what the hell to do. He turned to alcohol to cope. I was the oldest, so I spent a good amount of time caring for younger siblings while dad was at the bar. We lived in a tiny midwest town. I remember many times calling the local bar to ask my dad a quick question (the bartender would just pass the phone to him!).
One episode stands out in my mind. My brothers and I wanted to surprise dad with a 'unbirthday' party. I think maybe we read a story about an 'unbirthday' - celebrating like it's your birthday, but it's not. We spent the day crafting all kinds of decorations, and hung them throughout the house. We moved the furniture around in the dining room, so we could have a big cake (baked by yours truly!) and jump out and yell "surprise!" when he walked though the door. We waited, crouched down under the dining room table, for him to arrive after work.
Minutes, then hours went by. We sat forever. Finally, knowing that he wasn't coming home, I sent my siblings to bed. I heard my dad stumble in during the night, tripping over the rearranged furniture. I woke up the next morning and put everything back in place, and never said a word.
This stands out in my mind. I say this because, I have three children of my own now. It's things like this that I try and remember when I'm tempted to have another drink. I wonder what kinds of random memories they'll have of me someday.