Hello smahon02,

Welcome back.

Now, pay attention because I will be asking questions later and if you dont know the answers you will have to write 500 lines.

Did you make a huge mistake? No. You drank for a reason you suffer from untreated alcoholism.
Why would you pick up the bottle again? You drank again because you have an obsession for alcohol.
Are you stupid? No, you are not stupid, providing that you learn from what happened.
Will you do it again? Almost certainly, unless you learn from the experience.
Where does it end? It often ends in the gutter, sleeping in a cardboard box, in an insane asylum or in a wooden box.
No hope then? Yes, there is hope. However, you need to be prepared to go to any lengths to achieve sobriety. I went to AA.

Get up dust yourself off and start again! I have done it a few too many times but refuse to give up. In any war some battles will be lost. Count your sober days since you stopped drinking the 1st time against the times you have drunk. What is your average.
Barry

Stupid? Nope. Sick? Yes. There's a whole world of ways out of that bottle you're stuck in like AA, SMART, etc.. Pick one and run with it, girl. The alternatives are really not good to consider. Trust me on that...

Hugs,
Dennis

Get back on that horse and ride it!!

Thanks for telling me it still sux

1-2

Hangin in there Smahon? Forget the weekend. Be grateful we don't need to drink today. It might be difficult for a few days, but you'll find peace in sobriety. I recommend reading "Bill's Story" today. It may increase your resolve to heal.

PJ54 is RIGHT on! So is DennyGene as far as the existence of other programs. Pick one and run with it, I'll advise against dropping any program just because it might eventually conflict with your ego. I'm a huge proponent of AA. Regardless the program, you need to treat your alcoholism. Abstinence is only the entry fee, only the start. Abstinence, however, is not the same as treatment.
To be gentle on yourself, remember: You didn't lose the days of sobriety you had racked up before the relapse. You were sober then. You only lost the days during which you relapsed! HOWEVER, to rephrase the above, there is a difference between sobriety and recovery. Sobriety is just the ticket to enter the world of recovery. Get a program.
Uncover, Recover and the Discover!

Not alone, smahon02. That's the mystery of alcoholism. We keep going back to it even when we feel so much better. Been asking myself the same thing.

Why do we sabotage all things that help us? Could it be we think we don't deserve to be happy and free?

You are not stupid ,,,,, just forgive yourself and start again ,,,you can do this

Hi, smahon02

How are you 2day?

Im on day 2 again, bought a book called" The Road to Recovery" going to get started reading it tonight. Thanks everyone, I'm doing better. Not as angry at myself today.

I'd luv to hear about what the book is about in more detail as you go through it...