Hey, Bob
We had an animated member in our groups. Who would pace the Room and share with knowledge , passion and fervor and if a Chair needed to be thrown around or a table pounded on.. for color or to draw attention Karen didn't mind ,adding that to Her talk, she had been a well respected , highly decorated Army Nurse, involved in many conflicts In this mans Army, before Alcoholism took its toll. And at the end of each talk She would lower Her voice Become Quite soft And start explaining, How finding her Niche ( Place in life) while remaining sober , Was Her life's goal...She was a little intimidating at times , to say the least ...but carried a Powerful message .
Billy

I am glad to see your post this morning!!

I think that I finally have, too. I put an awful lot on myself because of who I thought I was. It was refreshing when I finally could say, "My name is Darrell and I am Alcoholic." My alcoholism was added to that long laundry list of "Sins" and "Bad stuff" that I was and what I had done. Somewhere while working the steps with my Sponsor I had a shift on the inside. It came to me that my Higher Power loved me regardless of whether I was good or bad. He had been keeping me all my life -- just for me to come to the point of surrender, just where I was at the moment. He just loves me because he loves me.I got that deal that said, "It's gonna be okay", and I still do somedays. I was given the opportunity to go on and work the rest of the steps. There are promises all over the Big Book and sometimes when I read it I run across a few. I can't help but wonder "When will I get that one".

Great Post, Bobinmaine!!!

I just though I was living like everyone else was.It seemed pretty normal to me.I wouldnt even try to be friends with someone who didnt party.Now I think of the so called straight people who tryed to be my friends and I ignored them and think shit I probely let some really good people pass me by.

My experience is very similar Bob. I came to recovery not knowing who the hell I was, who I was supposed to be, what I wanted to be. I was a mess. Resentments with people who I thought had made me something different to what I should have been drove me to the brink.

Today, I love who I am and I know that all he stuff that happened in my past made me who I am today. What a blessing!

I accept myself for all that I am, the positive and the negative and know that there is the power for change if and when required. I have my faults and foibles, but today I can look at them without feeling hurt or attacked and make a change.

This way of life, the manner of my living with the person that I am was a gift of the 12 step programme, without it I just don't know who or where I would be, but I am pretty sure it would not be good!

i really struggle with this, getting the balance of pushing myself to grow as a person and accepting my limitations its a tough one, my ego is so big i think i should be able to do anything i put my mind to - i can be extremly driven to the other end of the scale feeling like im worthless and crap at everything. still not worked it out lol

This really is an ENORMOUS key to recovery. I still don't have acceptance down 100% of the time. I can still get wrapped up in be frightened of making someone upset but then I think 'if I'm just being me then why are they upset?' Whose problem is it in the first place if they really don't like the 'real me' and there is one. Good topic.

This is great to think about!

I have a ways to go, but the more I reveal of myself, the more I accept myself, and the better I feel. I'm realizing I ain't so bad after all. :)

Billy, talking about your group member... Me, I tend to picture things in my head and sometimes when someone is sharing I will find something hilarious and I'm the only one laughing! But you know what? That's me. I can't stifle a laugh when I find something funny! No one has ever been offended that I know of.

~Chris

My only trigger was the obsession to drink-in whatever form it would manifest.

Hmmm....

I was arrogant, manipulative, self-centered and proud.

Accepting that I can be something different is key to my sobriety.

...but I know what you mean.