I feel that way too. I basically stay home but I'm new at this. I have gone to an AA meeting everyday last week an it's nice to be around people who get me. Hang in there we r only human and still allowed down days even sober :)

Hello hati,

First of all give yourself credit for what you have achieved so far. You are not at all pathetic because you have recognised that something needs attention and you are responding to that in a positive manner.

All I can tell you about the Twelve Step programme from my own experience is that it is an amazing journey of self-discovery that enables you to unlock a lot of potential that you have within yourself. I too was a people pleaser and was always worrying about what other people would say or think. I also had things like anger, fear and guilt about the past that kept the mind occupied with negative thoughts. That negative stuff had to be cleared out, a bit like cleaning up the hard drive of a computer, to leave space for something better.

Whether you decide to embark on that Twelve Step journey or not is your own business. Either way, it would be better not to isolate yourself too much. Even going to a meeting a few times per week will get you out of the house and talking to other people and that social element of AA can be as important as the actual meeting.

Starting from now, no more feeling pathetic. Instead, nearly four months and counting.

Thankyou NMac I should go to AA but cant pluck up the courage. I think Ive tried hard to stay sober but now think now what do I have to do this forever????
Hopefully I will feel better tomorrow.

I understand how you might be feeling hati. I had relied on alcohol so long I wasn't sure who I really was without a drink in my hand. When I had a drink I didn't much care.

The 12 Steps really did help me get a clearer picture of what was going on with my emotions and behaviour, that gave me some good insight into how my life and relationships could be more happy, rewarding and content. I had developed haphazard coping mechanisms that would not serve me well in sobriety so I started to learn better ones and how to be at peace with who I was as I moved on to a more effective way of living.

My closest relationships had been damaged through my drinking, given time in sobriety and some positive action from me, much healing came about.

I can't thank AA enough - and the lovely people who took time to help and support me, that's why I like to give a little something back today myself.

Contact me any time Hati if you think I could be of help to you about AA in the UK.

Thanks pj54 always love reading your comments. Good advice.

Thanks Antonia I will.

I would be dead drunk or dead today if i didnt find aa. The thing is that the alcohol was not the problem but the solution for me. I didnt like myself and would drink and drink to numb myself. now i actually am proud of myself and look forward to hitting a meeting to see my friends.

Look up a meeting and go. It is a wonderful thing.

I was able to 'quit drinking" for up to two years once. I was miserable. I would sit home and beat my fists into the bed and just be sad. I had alot of pent up anguish and hate too. I eventually HAD to drink again because the pain was too bad. This time I have just surrendered and go with the program. I am happy today. I am a greatful recovering alcoholic. I want to help the new comer. I have made friendships that are real and the ppl in the rooms do not judge.

Go Get you some. I am so glad i did.

1is2many

PS congrats on the sober time YOU are doing so well. Just make it better!!!

Thanks 1is2many good advice. Im glad AA helped you. I really should go.

Hati, I was afraid of AA. I can't tell you how grateful I am now because of it. I'm 4 months sober, and the enlightenment I get from my group (meetings are usually 60-80 people) is priceless. There's a familiarity now, like I'm meeting friends for coffee.