Hello Tony6,

All I can tell you is that I once thought that I was stronger than alcoholism and knew better. After all, I had read books, visited websites and had a ton of willpower. It was only when I admitted defeat and looked for help that I gained victory and up until tonight at least I have not taken another drink. Tomorrow is another day but I live in hope and have faith that I will stay sober. Maybe a different approach would work for you.

I've been doing so well!!! WTF! My life was getting better. I can't believe I let this happen! Willpower! !! I need to keep that. I'm getting back on this thing.

I'm such a disappointment to my self and my son..

Hello Tony6,

Willpower is good and for some people it is all that is required. For many others no amount of willpower is enough to stop drinking. That is why I mentioned trying a different approach. For me it is AA but you can find what best suits yourself.

You will not be a disappointment to yourself or your son if you learn from what has happened and make some changes.

Giday T6, The following are a couple of passages from the Big Book of AA. Is not my intention to thump the BB but to demonstrate what is your truth now was still the truth about this disease in 1935.

Big Book pg 22 para 2

"Why does he behave like this? If hundreds of experiences have shown him that one drink means another debacle with all its attendant suffering and humiliation, why is it he takes that one drink? Why can't he stay on the water wagon? What has become of the common sense and will power that he still sometimes displays with respect to other matters?"

pg 24 para 1

"The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so called will power becomes practically nonexistent. We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago. We are without defense against the first drink."

Just some thought material, G8

There is a big difference in cooperating and getting on with it. That's were the magic lays. Ideas and agenda seem innocent enough until you realize your expectations far outweigh what you are really doin and not doing in cooperating and what your really getting on with again. :(((

They say it takes a clear mind to see that and then from there adjust and go right instead of left or hit the wall again and say hymmmmm::((((: This suckssss WhYYYYY... Ha!!!

Billy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1wg1DNHbNU

It takes awhile to learn how to be sober and deal with stress. The more we learn to deal with the stress the less likely it will cause us to escape with booze.

Hang in there!

It sometimes takes a couple of slip ups to realize that you need to stop for good. I quit for 6 months at a time then I would think "well if quitting is so easy...and I've proven I can do it so why not have a drink."

I'm not sure if you read Allen Carr's book yet but his "Pitcher Plant" analogy was spot on for me. We can all see the drowned insects at the bottom of the pitcher plant but the stuff at the top tastes so good.....

Don't beat yourself up. Onward and upward is the only way to go.
Claire

I did 10-11 months before without a a drop and then I gave in and had 2 beers...
U said disease, I think addiction... Either way, you are trying and you are new to all this. When I say new, I mean getting and staying sober... Staying sober is the hard part. BTW, your not an F up...

Thx.... everyone.... Tomorrow is my new day one. My insides hurt again. Not a good feeling.

C'mon get sober. It rocks

Tony...so sorry to hear this...but stress is overwhelming...Not telling you what to do...but please make sure your son understands it is not his fault that you drank.

He may think cause he was in hospital he did this.
Oh sh*t...I hope your able to stop again. We think it is easy...Me...I always say lately....just 1 day of drinking...and for me it turns to 11....hope your doing better the faster you get up the better healthwise...trust me