Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
My 14 year old daughter asked me to tuck her in tonight. She turned on a cd I've been playing her since the day she was born. I always say yes when she asks if I'll "cuddle for a song" because it is rare since she's gotten older. I am grateful she still asks me. After a few songs and tickling her face she peacefully falls asleep. I wait and listen to her breathe and it makes me feel good that she fell asleep safe and happy. The entire world feels like a better place in that moment and I'm filled with gratitude for being blessed with such an amazing daughter. And still...I left her bedroom came into mine and immediately grabbed a drink. Just a beer but that is no justification. I want to feel good for longer than a few moments without drinking. I don't want to hide my drinking from her anymore. I want to be a mom with integrity. I want to be a role model for her. I don't understand how I can want these things so bad, and they are so much more important than a drink, but still I struggle to stop.
As others will tell you in this group - booze does things chemically to our brains. It's an addiction. And most of us need outside help with it.
You are here. And that's a good first step.
Whatever was going on in my life (good or bad) I would douse it in accelerant (alcohol) and put a match to it (my behaviour and consequences). Maybe you haven't put a match to it yet but it's all good to go if you do.
This will only go one way unless action is taken. How are you trying to stop, what actions are you taking? Are you ready to stop yet?
It is a great blessing to have such moments with your daughter and definitely something to be grateful for. Those times pass almost like the blink of an eye and before you know it they grow up and leave home.
Despite having a strong desire to be a good role model for your daughter you still struggle to stop drinking. It is important to understand the reason why you are finding it a struggle as many people do and then to look at what you need to do in order to succeed. You can read all sorts of stuff about different opinions about the drinking problem and it is easy to get side-tracked or confused. It is very, very important to start off from a position of understanding the exact nature of the problem as you can then apply a solution that works.
If you are an alcoholic, drinking may have become an obsession for you and if that is the case you will put the need for alcohol before everything else, including love for your daughter. Not only that but the condition is likely to progress and become much worse as time goes on unless you do something about it. Once you understand and more importantly, come to accept the problem, you can then look at what you need to do in order to remove that obsession. Personally, I had to get help from Alcoholics Anonymous.