I posted yesterday "Feeling Bad". The responses I got were amazing. I only read the first response before I went to bed. I was dreading today when I knew I would go to the store and today is my "usual" drinking day. I wanted to drink. After reading PJ's response, I lay in bed and I thought for a while. I knew I could not go to the store today without buying wine. I prayed, just a simple few words, 'God please help me to not drink. I can't do it." Today before I went to the store I went and had lunch first. I thought about the "knots" in my life, about this web site, and about my little sobriety goal thing that shows my days sober. The thought came into my mind that it seemed to make sense to start to unwind the "knots" in my life with the most troubling thing. I thought about my problems, and it occurred to me that unless I stayed sober I could not even begin to try to approach any of the other issues in my life. I repeated the little prayer in my head. I made it into and out of the store without buying alcohol! It was like a miracle happened. I went past the wine and did not buy it. I am sober. I feel less self pity today. I feel less anxiety today. I don't know what happened but I feel like jumping up and down and I feel a little silly for saying that. I do need therapy, and support, and help. But today instead of feeling sorry for myself and instead of being drunk, I am sober and I feel grateful and humble.