Hello I am new to this site today. I assume LC is limited contact. I recently (October 2016) went LC with my NM. I just did the behavior without saying anything back in March 2016, however she called me in October to ask why I had not been around. I did explain to her why and that for my own sanity, mental health, happiness and peace of mind I must do this. She attempted to do all of her usually tactics: talk over me, scream, yell, dispute what I was saying, however I just stopped whenever she spoke. When she took a breath, I would continue to speak. She eventually began to cry (another manipulation) and say how she wants us to be how we were. I politely explained that I know she does and if I were her, I would want things to be how they were too because everything was in her favor. I asked her that if she loves me or cares as she stated she does, to respect my wishes for limited contact. I asked her to began treating myself and sisters with the respect and dignity that we not only deserve, but always had given her. I explained that I would continue to buy Birthday and Christmas gifts and celebrate those special days with her and my family. Because she is 76 and living on social security, I explained that when needed, I will continue to give financial support to her. But I explained I will not give "ME". My time, energy, effort, knowledge, kindness, concern, etc. I explained that those things with be kept for those like my sister and son who express those things towards me. Since doing this, my life is much more peaceful. I also had to go no contact for several other Ns. Unfortunately after being raised by a N, I had formed several friendships and relationships with other Ns who had only taken and taken and taken from me. I am a giver by nature and I am only now learning to give to myself first. I still help some people, but I have learned to say no , a lot. This has obviously helped to get rid of many of the takers.

I had something similar happen with my dad. It was hard to reconcile because I have genuine, loving memories of him, along with abusive ones (emotional). Whereas, my mom, I have memories of her being good, but it never felt good, or loving. I associate warmth with my dad, even though he forgot every birthday, and was rarely available. My mom gave us birthday parties, with nice gifts, but then also left us in hot cars until we passed out. Along with many other things that I won't get into. I took from it that good people can be bad (my dad) and bad people can be good (my mom). I don't think my dad was a narc, I think he might actually have been slightly autistic (aspergers). I still remember that he blew on my cuts, taught me to program a computer, played piano with me when I was feeling jealous of my sister, and helped me to rescue a duck that was frozen to a lake when I was fourteen, because I couldn't let it get eaten by coyotes. In short, he cared. Trust your feelings on your dad.