Adult children of narcissistic parents Community Group
A space to explore our thoughts, feelings and experiences that have occurred as result of our childhoods with narcissistic parents (one or both). It is hoped that we can use this space as a further tool by which to take control of our lives from those we have inadvertantly relinquished it to, heal the hurt and be happy.
I was flipping through a biography of Diana, Princess of Wales to find an illuminating part written about Borderline Personality Disorder recently, when I came across this unbelievable incident witnessed by the Princess's equerry and private secretary, Patrick Jephson, when Prince Charles and Princess Diana were on a tour of the Gulf States in 1989. The royal host was offering his visitors coffee:
"The royal host and his senior guest [the Prince of Wales] were sticking manfully to their scripts . . . Plainly uncomfortable, the Princess was not joining in either, nor was she invited to by the Prince or her host.
She seemed to have created an invisible barrier round herself, as if to say that she was apart from the polite charade going on around her. To me she looked excluded and vulnerable. To the host as well, presumably, because eventually he leaned across the Prince to ask her politely what she was going to do during her visit. Under the unexpected attention she visibly brightened, perhaps thinking - as I was - of the serious programme we had arranged: visits to a day centre for mentally handicapped children, a clinic for immigrant women and a girls' business studies class.
The Prince also turned towards her, looking as if he were seeing her for the first time, ruefully indulgent, patronising. There was an expectant hush. Before she could reply, he said with studied innocence, 'Shopping, isn't it, darling?'
The words dropped into the marble stillness like bricks into plate glass. The Princess coloured, mumbled something inaudible and lapsed into silence. There was an awkward pause, broken by the Prince pointedly resuming his conversation with a host whose aquiline features now registered a politer version of the disbelief I felt.
When we were outside again, I cornered John Riddell [former private secretary to the Prince and Princess of Wales]. 'Did I see what I thought I saw in there?' I asked him.
He looked at me pityingly. 'Oh yes, Patrick. Indeed you did. That is the world we have to live in.' "
What a horrible way to treat your wife, and in front of another head of state as well! This looks like N behaviour from where I'm standing. What do others think?
"The royal host and his senior guest [the Prince of Wales] were sticking manfully to their scripts . . . Plainly uncomfortable, the Princess was not joining in either, nor was she invited to by the Prince or her host.
She seemed to have created an invisible barrier round herself, as if to say that she was apart from the polite charade going on around her. To me she looked excluded and vulnerable. To the host as well, presumably, because eventually he leaned across the Prince to ask her politely what she was going to do during her visit. Under the unexpected attention she visibly brightened, perhaps thinking - as I was - of the serious programme we had arranged: visits to a day centre for mentally handicapped children, a clinic for immigrant women and a girls' business studies class.
The Prince also turned towards her, looking as if he were seeing her for the first time, ruefully indulgent, patronising. There was an expectant hush. Before she could reply, he said with studied innocence, 'Shopping, isn't it, darling?'
The words dropped into the marble stillness like bricks into plate glass. The Princess coloured, mumbled something inaudible and lapsed into silence. There was an awkward pause, broken by the Prince pointedly resuming his conversation with a host whose aquiline features now registered a politer version of the disbelief I felt.
When we were outside again, I cornered John Riddell [former private secretary to the Prince and Princess of Wales]. 'Did I see what I thought I saw in there?' I asked him.
He looked at me pityingly. 'Oh yes, Patrick. Indeed you did. That is the world we have to live in.' "
What a horrible way to treat your wife, and in front of another head of state as well! This looks like N behaviour from where I'm standing. What do others think?
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My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...
Having said that, I don't think Charles was taught how to love. Sorry to criticise the queen in her jubilee year (I'm already heart sick of it being mentioned!) but you have only to see that film footage of her getting out of a train after WEEKS away abroad, and formally shaking his tiny hand instead of hugging him, then her next instruction was to tell him to look at the cameras! OMG he looked so puzzled. I think he was about 4.
VERY different from Princess Diana, who took one year old Wills along with her to Aus for their trip. Apparently they tried to persuade her to leave him in the UK. They should have known then by her reaction, that they had underestimated her greatly!
That behaviour of Charles' was so invalidating and belittling. And he got his own way in the end, Camilla will be queen when he succeeds the throne. Made your bed go lie on it lol.
I love the Princes and Catherine though.xx
On the other hand, being in Charles's shoes as a little boy must have been so strange... no wonder he couldn't relate to Diana's suffering. He probably thought she should have been looking after him, not the other way round!
I love the Princes as well, and Catherine seems like a very poised young woman. I just saw today that some of the elder royals, including her father-in-law, have been taking an interest in helping her with her work - they've probably learned their lesson after Diana's needs were not sufficiently provided for early on. I don't think they realise how strange a world it is for a non-Royal to enter. Perhaps after Diana, it became more clear to them, so hopefully Catherine will have an easier time of it.
I feel that Charles should abdicate, just as his ( Great) Uncle? Prince Edward did with Wallis Simpson. I personally think it should go straight to Prince William. I often think what's the common denominator here, the Royal family, and all of these other people marrying into that same family. Surely, all these other people cannot all have mental problems and the Royal family is totally healthy? I have always felt that 'established' family's have a lot of Narcissism. Over here, in the states, it's the Kennedy family. Same kind of thing, Don't rock the boat, keep the Image squeaky clean, cover up all messes. And NEVER reveal your weaknesses!!!!!
I think my step family thrived on this ideology as well. Anytime, anyone asks you to change yourself, not be authentic, forces you to adhere to other's beliefs is plain and simple: NARCISSISM!
I wish Catherine all the best. I am glad though, she and William live away from the main source of crazy standards. Gosh, every time I see both William and Harry, I think of Princess Di and how they all went to the amusement park when the boys were little, the log flume ride, And how they all looked so happy. I think it was her that helped them to be not as stuffy as the royals are today. I could be wrong, but, It's what I think.