Adult Children of Alcoholics Community Group
A Support Group for Adult Children of Alcoholics
This year, we are hosting Thanksgiving at my house! (I am dueto give birth the day after, so wish me luck! Ha.) Remember, I kicked my dad out last month and he has been homeless since. However, my mother asked me if I was inviting him to thankgiving dinner... I told her I totally havent thought of that, but why should I? She said "Becuase he is your father". Ugh. Yeah, he is. And i love him. And I miss him. And he was always good to me growing up (other than taking my money andusing me for his addiction... and being rude that last few month, and mooching off me for that last two years).
WHat would you recommend? A simple invitation? Every holiday he usually ends up drunk and passed out on the floor anyways so he might not even show up, but should I at least extend the invite? IDK.
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check out that smoke ring. It tasted really good. I smothered it with Maulls BBQ sauce which is Local to St. Louis and one of the best I ever had.....
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I was recently separated from my wife of 33 years and it's complicated. Anyway I rented a room about 15 minutes away and I see my kids about once a week. I see the people who own the house I live in once in a while but other than that I stay in my room where I do my cooking, wash dishes in the shower, read, color, and sleep. I get out at least once a day. I grocery shop and I attend 2 meetings...
You have the right to decide what goes on in YOUR home. If she wants him around, next year she can have him at HER house.
It is YOUR decision. You do not have to be guilted into anything you do not want.
My two cents. I know it's easier said than done. I do not like holidays. They are stressful bc of alcoholic behavior and unspoken expectations from "family"... and they think being family gives them an "excuse"... I have hated them for years now....
God Bless
Just to let you know , you are not alone when it comes to stressing about the holidays.
Me and my husband just had a long talk about how stressful they are to me and how I'm already dreading Thanksgiving....
I've been on edge all day and I finally put my finger on it... unrealistic expectations from the dry drunk in my life / the dry drunk will not get help and creates havoc when they do not get their way. It's like having a 3 year old child... the acting out and fit throwing. It's ridiculous. And I never know when it's coming....
U know... even when a person gets 'dry' ... if they do not get help, not much is accomplished bc the behaviors are the same.
So. You are not alone. I am dreading them too and having to make decisions that I might get "in trouble" for making. I always seem to make the dry drunk MAD. It's not fun.
Ginger