Adoption Support Group
Adoption is the legal act of permanently placing a child with a parent or parents other than the birth parents. Whether you are looking to adopt, putting your child up for adoption, parenting an adopted child, or just thinking about it, this is the place to discuss.
I was adopted at 3 days old. Shoved from house to house ended up with an older family. They loved me but when my adopted dad died I felt shoved out. I found my biological family but again feel like I don't belong. I am 36 and have a family of my own but no one understands that I don't know who I am or why I've been classed as the black sheep. I just need to know I've asked why and why I was adopted and I get you don't need to know. And my adoptive mum does not talk to me.
vuemastr
Brydonna I am so sorry to hear about your situation. I can not even begin to imagine how difficult it must be to not feel like you have a place in this world to "come from". My heart breaks that you are going through this. I pray you seek some counseling to deal with this; finding yourself and coming to peace with the unknown will not only help you heal but allow you to be the strong, healthy, amazing woman you need to be for your own family. Please take care of yourself; you owe it to your own children to be whole for them.
Katt11
Hi, not sure if you will see this but I understand everything you're saying. I was adopted at 2 months of age and have always felt lost, alone and empty. In fact I'm having a very hard time right now. I have a grown daughter but this feeling of emptiness etc is unbearable, it hurts so much. I seem to go through periods of crying then try to not think about it all. Just want to say. I known the intense hurt. Hope you are ok.
Rae
I am so sorry for your struggle. I have four children who have been adopted. I have found them struggling as you do between the fit of biological versus adoptive families. So far three of the four have figured it out. I do recommend counseling or therapy to discuss your feelings which are not wrong but normal. Something that I can share is that sometimes it doesn't matter whether a child is biological or adopted some kids just fit better with their parents. I can tell you that I don't love any of my children less, but I can also tell you that it is easier with some of my children than others. Remember this, you don't have to decide between one family or the other. You don't have to like your parents all the time or your brothers or sisters all the time. Family are the ones that show up when you need them, are there when the going gets rough, and love you when you don't even love yourself. One of my daughters who didn't want to pursue any more of her biological family said "blood is overrated." Try to live in the moment and dont' over think everything. People that care about you will be there and those that don't care enough can be put in the acquaintance category or the I like them but can't depend on them. It won't hurt anybody for you to love them all.
jkelly
Wow I totally relate to your feelings , I've struggled with this all my life , I was adopted and also adopted out my first child when I was 18 years old . I've never felt like I belonged anywhere , I feel I'm not worthy of being loved in so many ways , have never been able to have a normal relationship which I pray everyday to the unierverse that this will change . I'm 50 now my other children have grown up and left and there respect for me is shocking at times ... I sure wish someone could help and understand where I'm at in my life .also . I spend a lot of time alone and cry often also . My thoughts are with you , I've just joined this group hoping I'll find answers to help me through and have just opened a group on FB that I hope many will join . The group is adoption Belonging if anyone is interested in joining . Take care ❤️
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