I understand your feeling of being lost. I feel that way a lot myself. I have always done some kind of craft since I was a little girl. Before the accident I did it for stress relief and just for the joy of making something. Now I do it so I feel like I have a purpose. I make beaded jewelry, chainmail , crochet and knit. It keeps me sane, busy and attached to the world. Maybe you can find something like that. Are you good at any crafts? Maybe you could take pictures. I do sell what I make, but I sell it more for the need to refuel my habit than really making a living out of it. Plus I always have something to match what I am wearing.LOL! If you like to bake you could make things for the elderly or shut ins. Maybe you could do some mild volunteer work for your church, or school? Of course you could always just hang on the computer all day and talk on DS the way I do. LOL! I do know how you feel though. I have days where I think i just can not spend another day playing around, doing nothing. Those are the days i drag myself out of bed and make myself put one foot in front of the other. I too stay up all hours of the night. i have to make sure I am exhausted before going to bed or I will just lay there awake instead of sleeping. Keep trying to move forward and know we are all here for you. Jenn

i understand what you are going through too. of lately it's like i have nothing to get up and look forward too. since my accident last june i am still not working and don't know what i will be able to do. i didn't like work but at least i had a reason to get up and had a good paying job. people say you gotta find a hobby, well better said then done. they aren't in my shoes.

The old saying, "CAN't Never Could." IS A GOOD SAYING. and a better one is : "Your Handicap Is Only As Bad As Your Attitude." I am not in anyones shoes but my own. I see people every day that are more handicapped, in more pain and have more problems than I do. They have a pourpose in their life and live and keep on trucking. From time to time our load may be heavier than we have ever had and we may think we cant carry it but we have to . Life changes evey day even in non handicapped lives and there are struggles and hard ships. We have to be creative and we have to be willing to work on the challenge and be willing to change the way we do every thing and even the way we think. Life is not easy. No one can go poof and make problems go away. But we can become more positive and creative and take on a challange and meet life head on and be willing to face the new life we have now. Do not look back . It will only set you back . Look forward. I have had many changes and problems in my life. I have had to face many things I would rather have not had to face.
I do not have all the answers but I do have advice . wWork at being happy no mater what comes your way. hHve a good attitude. Look at what you can do or learn to do, not what you can't do. Find a new way to do things or find new things you can do. One of my teenage friends became paralized from the neck down in an accident. She thought her life was over as it was as she had once known life to be. Everything changed in a drastic way in one slpit second. Her dreams went up in smoke. She did not think she had a reason to live. She lived to be about 63 years old living all that time from age 16 to 63 paralized from the nech down. But she became much more than she ever thought she could be. She became something she had never dreamed or ever thought she could be.
She became several things that she did not think she would ever be because she was paralized from the neck down. She beacme
!. a wife.
2. a mother
3. a cub scout den mother
4. a woman with a degree
5. a well know extremly talented artist
6. a very talented writer
7. self employed
8. a grandmother
9. a motavational speaker
10. she had a happy life
11 . The most importan thing she became was a person with a good attitude. It took her farther than she ever thought she could go. It brough many wonderful people into her life.
She had to work hard and suffer dissipointment all along the way but she did not let her unforunant injuruy or her handicap get in the way. She went on with a differernt life not one she use to have and not the one she would have chosen but because he had no other choice she made a new life filled with purpose and joy and happiness. It was not easy but it was worth it. This amazing woman painted beautiful painting some as small as your fingernail with a paint brush in her mouth and she wrote beautiful poems and greetings for card and even books with a pen in her mouth. Her head was the only thing she could move. and the one thing she could use. Now it is your turn to use your head as if it is the only thing you have to do anything with. You are very lucky to be alive. What will you do with the life you have. It all most all up to you. It takes a good attitude!