Abstinence & Celibacy Support Group

The pressures of sex from peers, the media and culture can be overwhelming, but you are in total control of your body and celibacy is a choice that many are making. Find sanctuary with people who are choosing to abstain without fear of judgment.

676 Members

1,251 Posts

0 Online

pmddtaylor 11/20/2015

I've been celibate 12 years, then I had two insanely toxic affairs with mentally ill men back to back after the 12 year period of celibacy. The first one I found out too late was an unregistered sex offender. He had looks as awesome as Brad Pitt and some other very handsome actors. The second one was similar, but he turned out to be violent. I had to remove him from my home.

I didn't get hit by him, I just realized soon enough that he was a beater.

Now, I am glad to be back celibate. I have even lost interest in sex, so celibacy is not hard for me.

I pulled apart and analyzed why I had the silly affairs, which were both on and off lover love/hate BS stuff. I learned a lot about narcissists, sociopaths, and how cunning and manipulative one can be.

Just because a man is charming, sweet, and gorgeous doesn't mean he's safe.

scandalousbeauty 01/02/2016

Hey Taylor! I have had the same experience with men. I was celebate in my teen years and then hooked up with this guy from church for a few months. He was so mentally, physically and sexually abusive. He put on such a beautiful front and I fell in love with him hard. Then He broke up with me because I wasn't good enough for him. Sure did a number on my brain. I didn't have sex for 4 years after that. I was terrified of sex after that guy. The next guy was my brother's best friend and was 16 years older than me. I treated him like a king and he was emotional and verbally abusive to me. He was on all kinds of drugs and I had no clue because he lied but when I moved out the dick had hid his stash inside of my coat I never wore. I was so pissed. We had sex 6 times in 6 months. He cheated on me with my niece. He got me pregnant in the beginning and I wasn't ready to have a baby yet but I was going to keep the baby and love the baby but I miscarried at 14 weeks. I never recovered from that. Then I hadn't had sex since then but I was having a lot of female problems and kept going to the gyno and 3 years after he left I found out that he had given me a std that could have potentially left me with fertility problems. I haven't put myself back out there sexually since. These experiences have been really eye opening for me. I honestly don't care if I ever have sex again.

nierika 02/09/2016

I find the longer I am without sex the easier it is Is itme or do you all find men wanting to get you into bed much too quickly after knowing them..I am in the over 60 generation?.

scoobydoobydoo 02/25/2016

My last boyfriend put me in the emergency room; I have had lots of bad relationships, and this I guess was the last straw for me emotionally. Even thinking about having sex again, it makes me think of the last time I was with him, and it literally makes me nauseous. It's not that I hate men in general (not saying you or any of the other posters do either); it's just that I decided to take time off from relationships for a while and get my head together, and came to realize that I honestly just didn't miss it.

I think our society puts too much importance on sex and intimate relationships. Who's to say there really is somebody out there for everybody, and that you have to be worried about finding them, because otherwise you are an incomplete person? I think some people don't really need it. I am happier now that I ever was, been celibate for almost 3 years now. I'm glad I found this group!

shelle68 06/17/2016

I am in a LDR. I will visit him in July, and he will move back here to close to me in December. We hadn't dated long before he had orders to leave. We decided to wait until we truly love one another and have no doubts or inhibitions before we even consider sex.

Womanofworship49 11/12/2016

Wow....been there, done that! Different situations will teach you a lot about people. You can't judge a book by its cover, be it good or bad. You said you were celibate for 12 years.....where you abstaining for a reason(s) other than just not having sex because you weren't in a relationship? Abstinence is the act of not having sex but celibacy is abstaining from sex with an intended purpose. Which one are you practicing?

Join the Conversation