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Inventory

Group Foundergjm
gjm
The goal isn't to do a successful inventory. The goal is to dig to the deepest levels of self-honesty.
--Anonymous

The Fourth Step is the hardest one for many newcomers in the Program. It is so difficult, in fact, that some of us still waiting to do it are no longer newcomers.

It's so hard to be honest with ourselves, that some of us never accomplish it. The consequence of this is low self-esteem, which draws us toward failure.

Help is available, though. God, who knows all about us, is willing to help us get honest with ourselves. We only need to ask. Until we become honest with ourselves, we can't grow spiritually.

Today I pledge to be honest.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Ya know I was thinking today (no joke!) that this step helped me take a look at how I treated others. I saw things that I didn't like at all.....and through the rest of the steps, was able to change how I treated others and that makes me a much happier (and nicer!) person.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I can still remember that moment when I finally saw myself as really was, and not how I thought I was. At first I stared at the writing on the paper , cold , frozen in myself,then all sorts of emotions. After I had settled down a few days later the feeling of relief came.I knew I could stop being that other person if I worked at it.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I will admit to having real trouble with this step as I am trying to work on it now. I end up doing multiple pages on "let's beat up on Karen some more", and I know that isn't what it is supposed to be or what my sponsor wants me to do.

I'm trying but struggling.

Karen
deleted_user
deleted_user
I did a second step 4 inventory recently. It was really very very simple. It consisted of making a list of the nature of my wrongs and reflecting on how these defects affected others giving the odd specific example.

The honesty was helped along by a very perceptive sponsor. I found actually doing the inventory in front of the sponsor very helpful, as I could stop and ask questions.

It only took about 45 minutes or so to root out all the major flaws in my character and my grosser handicaps.

The first one I did took much longer and was less revealing in many respects - just different I suppose.

All in all, it is a rewarding step, particularly as you get to have all the defects removed at the end of it.