They laughed when they saw him put iodine on his paycheck. They didn't know he had an awful cut in his salary.

Question: What do you call a supermarket cashier in China?
Answer: A chinese checker!

The cub reporter's first assignment was to stand outside on the sidewalk and interview people as they laughed all the way to the bank.

A preacher walked into a tavern during the course of his welfare work and ordered a glass of milk. By mistake he was served an egg-nog. After drinking it to the last drop, he raised his eyes heavenward and was heard to say, "Lord, what a cow!"

Teacher: What does HNO3 stand for?
Student: I've got it right on the tip of my tongue...
Teacher: Spit it out right away - it's nitric acid!

On the morning of the last day of school, Johnny's mother goes into his bedroom and hollers, "Wake up and get ready for school." Johnny pulls the sheets up over his face and mutters, "Give me one good reason why I should go to school today." His mother answers, "Well, for starters, you're the school principal."

If you're uncertain about which is the correct spelling when choosing between the words "principle" and "principal," just remember this mneumonic (memory aid): "the principal is our pal." While you may contest the accuracy of the principal actually being your pal, because his/her principle job may be to maintain discipline in the school, this idea will help you with spelling if you can mentally break down principal into princi-pal. See, there is a pal in there! Oh, the horror of it all, the realization that learning can be fun! And now, back to the stuff that's actually funny... :)

Chalk this one up to "dumb criminals" - as if there are any other kind!

A bandit walked into a Bank of America branch and handed a demand note, scribbled on the back of a Wells Fargo deposit slip, to a teller. The quick thinking teller said, "Sir, this is a Wells Fargo bank deposit slip. You'll have to take it to them." The would-be bank robber thanked the teller and left. The teller then immediately called Wells Fargo and told them they were about to be robbed. The police were waiting at the Wells Fargo bank branch when the bandit arrived, and they arrested him there.

How do you keep a cow in suspense?




















I'll tell you later.

>^~^<

How do you keep a cow in suspense?




















I'll tell you later.

>^~^<

Try this one on someone, or perhaps not:

Question: What did the moron have for breakfast?
Answer: This morning you had scrambled eggs and toast!

Good ones one and all!

You talkin' to me!!!!!!! lol

(In reference to the moron joke) lol

Nope, it's something you can try on others, particularly if they're tied up and unable to move!

A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom, and said, "Your first job will be to sweep out the store." "But I'm a college graduate," the young man replied indignantly. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know that," said the manager. "Here, give me the broom - I'll show you how."