You don't understand

No, you don't understand how it feels to stand over your daughter's grave. 
You don't understand what it's like to lay awake night after night,
with tears soaking your pillow.
You have no idea what it's like, to be afraid to open your mailbox
because you know there will be a coupon for your baby's first birthday cake,
except your baby is in a coffin, 3 miles away from home.
You have no idea how it feels for the whole world to move on
and you're still trapped in a nightmare.
You have no idea how it feels to have hope for your rainbow baby growing inside  
you just to have your rainbow die and slowly bleed out of your body.
You don't know how scary it is, to think you will never be a Mommy
You don't know what an angelversary is 
or how it feels to cry into a teddy bear in an empty nursery.
You don't know what it's like, to see your best friend's baby have a first birthday
party, the day before your child should have had theirs.
You have no idea what it is to be a mommy to an angel
And I hope you never do.
 
I don't know if that was supposed to be a poem or what. It just came out like that.  I know you all understand, so I won't try to explain.