Yet it was YESTERDAY
I am so tired. So weary. And sometimes just don't know what to do..I can not believe it will not register in my brain my heart my son will be gone 5 years Dec 30, 2014 to know again one day or week or month has passed and I have not talk, touched, joked, gone to dinner with Ken in that much time. Where did the days, months, years where did they go. Yet it seems only yesterday we were at a mom and pops eating Pizza. And then he has lost the ability to talk to share. then he can't move his arm, he is dragging his leg...then he collapsed and rushed to UAB. He is coded for 15 mins..he is rushed to surgery. Then 40 days he takes his last breat on this earth...how can that be almost 5 years ago when my heart exploded into a million pieces never to repair. I think how could it be almost 5 years ago as he lays in ICU not awake has not been awake. I am looking out the window hoping he can hear and shocked to see the Christmas Lights on. How, where did these years go. I just can not understand , comprehend, can't believe the tears I have cried the journals I have written it just can not be 5 years since Ken left this world called home. How did I survive. I don't know. My heart does not burst like fireworks as they did. How could Kenny be gone what just seems like yesterday...almost 5 years. How heavy my heart is yet I travel forward...yet I just can't imagine.....where did the minutes hours days months. Year after year. Yet it was yesterday.
Replies
Oh Sandi. I am with you. Where did the 5 years go? Lisa will be gone 5 years on December 1. Even now it seems unbelievable. But we have persevered. We have shed an ocean of tears. And we have done it together.
Love and huge hugs,
Marlene
Yes we have and we will continue to share with each other. Reach out to each other as we know only another mom knows
Understanding as only another mother who is on this path walking beside of you can. I too almost lose my breath as I moved through six years last July. Just not possible to comprehend on so many heart levels... I know my friend, I know...
With you and caring...
Hand in hand and Heart to heart,
XO Joanie
I cannot imagine what I will feel like at 5 years of not hearing my daughter\'s voice, not having lunch with her, not seeing her name on my phone but I\'m coming up on her 1st anniversary and I can barely breathe some days. It is gut wrenching pain not to have our children. To look back at the time that has passed but yet still remember that very moment when they left this earth is mind boggling to those that have not been there. I\'m there, with you.
I\'m thinking about you and praying for moments of peace ((hugs)) Vicki
Love and lots of hugs to you!
I\'m totally with you Sandi. It\'s been five years now for me and I wonder the same thing. It seems like such a long time yet I can still remember and feel that awful day like if it was yesterday. Sending you love and tight hugs.
Peace,
Diane
8 years since I hugged Marissa or saw her beautiful smile. Jennifer is four years in two weeks. It is still a fog with my heart so shattered. Sending you love and hope as we go on this journey. Hugs, Kathy
my 5 years is here just before thanksgiving,,,,, and yes,,, tis so hard,, cannot believe it... love and hugs to you dear Sandi..... I hold your hand and walk beside you...
I soooooo agree about the \"time\" but the pain and heartache never ceases and never will..
On Sept 19th it was 38 yrs. since I lost my infant Mary and it will be 6 yrs. for Melissa on Nov. 23rd. It seems i
impossible that all this time has passed. But at the same time, it feels like an eternity since I was able to hold and talk and hug Melissa. We do all walk this journey together and will do so until we meet again on the other side. XOXOXO
This Dec 20th will be Mike\'s 6th Angel date. Just like you where did the time go. My grandson is now 5 and in kindergarten, he was born 2/5/09 never met his dad. He is very cute but now lives near Clearwater and I do not get to see him. The twins are here every weekend because their Mom works weekends. They keep me on my toes and worn out LOL
Sending you lots of hugs
Penny
The years passing by scares me. It\'s hard for me to explain. I am 3yrs along in this journey. It feels like I am getting farther away from him. I know he is all around me but don\'t want the years to come between me and him.
Hugs