Yes, I'm still alive ... :-)

Omg, I can't believe it's been almost a year since my last journal entry last Sept.  Gosh where does the time go. I've been meaning to journal for so long but life with 3 little ones and a full time job is still very busy and emails/phone calls just aren't happening the way they used to before the girls were born.  I've accepted that, in fact I've embraced it as I love being a mom...more than I ever imagined although I guess no one can prepare you for parenthood.  And, once the girls became more mobile and napped less, there just wasn't as much free time for me.
Liam  turned 4 in June and he had his first real party this year, at a gym.  The kids had a fantastic time.   He's growing up so quickly but is still my little boy.  Liam is like the energizer bunny ... not much can slow him down and we're always looking for things for him to do on the weekends to burn up that energy.  He's doing really well in preschool and I'm so proud of him.  I've occasionally taken him to SFO for a play-date with a friend's daughter as he loves being on airplanes...hmm, wonder where he got that from 

Genavee and Mattea are 20+ months and in some ways are easier to take care of than when they were infants but in other ways, it's more difficult. Thankfully, unlike Liam, they are great sleepers ... sleep til 7:30 or 8a each morning and take 2 hour naps in the afternoon.   Liam would get up at 5:30a, maybe a bit later and he was such a poor napper.   The girls definitely have distinctive personalities.  Gena (who was born 1st) is the dominant one.  She did everything physical first ... crawl, stand, walk.  She's even starting to use the potty now whereas Tea likes to pick up the potty and move it into the living room, and then turn around to bring it back to the bathroom.  Gena is also better with utensils than Mattea as she's fairly good at feeding herself using them while Tea might pick up a carrot with her fork, and then takes it off the fork with her hand to put it in her mouth :-)  Genavee's a very smart girl.  However, Mattea is much more verbal than Genavee.  She'll point to things, is told what it is and then tries to say it.  They are saying some words and both of them know the dreaded words "no" and "mine."   Both of them understand so much of what we're saying. 

Although, Gena finally started to say mama last week and now, when I come home from work she says mama, and runs to me.  Whereas Mattea runs to me and says daddy ... too funny.  It seems to me that they both like to be held more and cuddled than Liam did...a girl thing?

Gena has started to become jealous of her siblings when they pick up something and often tries to take it from them.  When it's returned to whomever had it, Genavee throws herself on the floor and has a meltdown ... definitely a drama queen.  Not that Tea doesn't have her own melt downs as well.  Mattea is still such a love bug.  She doesn't mind being held by anyone while Gena is more particular.  There's also such a joy that is exudes from her doing simple things ... i.e. she loves to run and has a sheer look of delight on her face as she does so.  It's incredible to watch.  Not that Gena isn't a happy baby, she is, but it's different.   It's so interesting raising twins and I'm grateful for the experience.  Most of you remember I had great trepidation when I learned I was pregnant with twins ... especially as we had no family close by to help.  However I now can't imagine my life w/o the girls.  

I'm still flying and for the first time in years, I feel secure in that I won't be furloughed again.  In fact, AA is going to hire 1400 new f/as next year.  I'm so hoping this will move me from the bottom of the seniority list at LAX, where I've been for 10 years as AA hasn't hired any f/as since 2001.  Somehow, I've managed to be able to fly day trips (or turns as they're called) so that I can be home each night with my children, and I've also been fortunate in that I rarely have to fly on wkends.  Liam is so cute in that when I leave for work, he'll tell me through the open patio sliding door that he'll miss me and waits for me to reply as I'm outside walking to the garage. 

As for me, I'm okay...not happy b/c my marriage is falling apart and Steve doesn't want to salvage it so that's it.  I'm looking to buy a house & then I will move out.  I'm also still missing Elizabeth so much.  I still think of her each and every day  ... just wish I could p/u the phone and talk to her.  I didn't realize how close we were or how profoundly it would effect me until it actually happened.  I read an article that said losing siblings is incredibly difficult b/c it's the longest relationship you have as you're with them before your spouse or kids and your parents die first.    But, life does go on and I'm blessed with 3 wonderful children.  They light up my life.  I hope you all have a wonderful summer and I'm going to try to attach some pix soon.  Sorry this is so long ... I'm going to make an effort to journal more often as this is for me too :-)
xo

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

Hey Michelle! Great to hear from you! Sounds like a busy life but joyous with the children! Glad to hear AA is hiring.. that must take a tremendous amount of pressure off.... sorry about your marriage... that must be so tough. Bless your heart. xoxox
deleted_user
deleted_user

Hi! What a great update on the kids. Sounds like they are doing so well and that they are just thriving. I have no idea how you do it all. Glad to hear you won\'t be furloughed again. I know that always weighs on your mind.
I can\'t relate about Elizabeth. I think about calling or seeing mom and dad all the time. I\'m still so sad they never got to know Holden. I just want to pick up the phone and call my mom too. Just for a minute. It\'s so hard.

I\'m so sorry things aren\'t better with Steve. Sounds like you have a good plan in place. That doesn\'t make it any easier I\'m sure. Please lean on me if you need to.
YvonneKB
YvonneKB

Loved your update on Liam and the girls - I can\'t believe Liam is 4! Does it get easier when they\'re that age? It was great to read about the differences in your girls personalities, I bet having twins is such a kick!

I\'m so sorry about your marriage. I imagine going through that, especially with three children has to to be incredibly hard. Big Hugs to you!
deleted_user
deleted_user

OMG- I can\'t beleive Liam is 4 and the girls are 20 monthjs!!!! johnny is 15 months. I miss chatting with you. I go to Doc tom to meet with Re and RN and begin my FET! I am both anxious and excited! I also remain positive and hopeful!!! I will be taking 3 oral meds and the PIO, when the package was delivered I was surprised to see how much less meds I am taking for a FET versus a Fresh Cycle. Please pray for me and my family! Did u ever do a FET cycle?