wreck.

i am a wreck today. i overslept thinking it would be good for me. my plans that were gonna distract me from my misery got canceled. i cant get ahold of the one person that can make or break my day. i feel sooo alone, and rejected, and abandoned and forgotten. its like i could die right now! and i doubt anyone would notice. then i started crying and crying. and crying some more. then i started havin trouble breathing. and i was like hyperventalating. and shaking. and i was just pacing back and forth. and for some reason brushing my hair calmd me down, which im seriously considering as a sign of being fucken crazy. ughhhlsdkjflskdjfsd.fsd. its no wonder im rejected. im so not good enough. i hate anxiey. and i hate feeling depressed and soooo fucken lonely. ughhhh. i miss my life, the way it used to be. it used to be soooo perfect. and everything just crashed!!!!