Wow its been hard..

These last couple of days have been sooooo hard in this journey.  I have had a hard time staying positive lately.  I have been mean to my husband because I get sooo jeolous that he has a child and I don't.  I feel like I just dont want to be married because sometimes being married reminds me of the family that I seem to cant have!! MY GOODNES I AM SOOOO FRUSTRATED I FEEL LIKE MY TIME WILL NEVER EVER COME!!    I KNOW THAT NOT MY WILL BUT YOURS BE DONE GOD, BUT IT HURTS SOO BAD!!  I WANT TO BE A MOMMY! =(