Winter Wonderland!
Oh! My "update" is a setback. I'm barely able to sit up now. This is the first time I've been online in a while. After over 3 weeks, the swelling is still quite significant and very painful. And my darn pancreas still hurts (probably from the swelling pushing in it). Sigh. I KNOW it will be better soon, but egh.My hubby, Matt, has to do EVERYTHING! I can't even put on my own socks. Poor Matt, huh? I feel bad for him. But soon, I hope to be a super human good-type BORG hybrid and THEN! Oh boy, THEN I'll really be able to DO stuff! Off to lay in bed some more (can't have a bath or lay on couch without someone here to help me! TG I can at least get to the bathroom without assistance, aye? Haha). Love to all and hope you're enjoying some of this winter wonderland! I'll send another update when I can. And also, I know I'm so very behind in answering all - sorry! Will catch up when I can. Gotta shuffle now...
Replies
Hey nibs, not to worry bout answering folks, you just need to get well. I\'m puzzled though about the swelling and why it would last this long without some sort of reason, i.e. infection, or did they leave a sponge in ya? hee hee hee, sorry just couldn\'t resist and yes soon you will be one with the collective, I was assimilated awhile ago and upgraded with additional borg parts added to my spine, hee hee hee I truly am becoming borg. later
Hello, number 4. This is number 1 speaking. I\'m actually puzzled about how swollen I am too (and I\'m not talking about my ego - that\'s so deflated it needs implants!!). It\'s above the metal pump on the left front abdominal - right over the left ribs. When I first woke up, it was HUGE!! And it\'s still really quite swollen and painful. The doc said he had to create a pocket to put the pump in and that swelling was where he separated the skin and muscles (why there I don\'t know) and now it was filled with blood and fluid. But that was on Dec 11th!! I\'m worried but hate to bother him.
And I try to be quite and out of sight for Matt since he\'s going thro his own breakdown. I haven\'t seen anyone else since my hospital/doc visits. It sure gets lonely when you go days, weeks, even months without seeing anyone but someone who doesn\'t want to see you! Thank God for Wyn (my furry baby!).
Are you also isolated or do you have some support? Can you believe my therapist, whom I am very very fond of and thought she also felt the same way, dumped me about 3 months ago (when I admitted I felt suicidal of all times!!!). I image most people feel that way at some point, but why oh why did she pick then to dump me? And how awful a person do you have to be to have your therapist dump you?? Yikes, I\'m getting chills - I/We can feel the collective singing and I need to go join them... TTFN number 4! We will try to get online tomorrow and see if you got a chance to reply!
Well #1 I was in hibernation mode until about an hour ago, think I ingested more Cymbalta than I was supposed to, or it might have been all the allergy crap I\'m taking to keep from sneezing my implants off, but either way I slept most of the day away, which also could be one of my hormones outta whack due to cp causing it which happens from time to time where I either can\'t sleep at all or no one can wake me up, weird as I\'ve always been a light sleeper, but I\'ve been told enough times later on to have to believe it plus all the missing time can\'t be entirely chalked up to time aboard the collective mothership! I\'m not much on therapy folks as their basically paid friends, but hey they work for some folks, now as to yours bailing at that point in time, well I guess you didn\'t pay her enough, hee hee hee, yep we all feel the old I\'m outta here feelings from time to time, seems to go hand in glove with this illness, and as to your pocket filling with fluids, well mine was carved outta fat and the pump stitched to muscle, so dunno about separating skin from muscle, seems a touch on the wrong end of things, but mine is just below the skin and you can clearly see its outline, but any swelling of mine was gone in a couple of weeks, now the bruising well that\'s another story all together, but if yours is still swollen methinks there is some what amiss and it is time to bother your doctor. I\'m not sure why your hubby is having a break down but it is to be expected as those who love and care for us can only handle so much before they themselves blow a gasket and need some tlc, unfortunately we can\'t provide it most days so their in quite a pickle. Mine does well most of the time as she has been a care giver of one sort or another for most of her life including over 20 years in mental health probably why she just blows me off when I get suicidal, guess she figures if I don\'t like pain why would I hurt myself more, good point actually. So other than her the almost 30 yr old child still living at home who spends all his time in the gym building his body and telling me all the time all this can be fixed doing body building(bullshit)I was one back in the 80\'s so I have to keep reminding him I already know everything he does and was doing it before he was born so shaddup about it already, hee hee hee, not a lot of support there, brother in law near by but he has his own can of worms and about 6 kids to deal with on his own as mama decided it was time for her mid life crisis and fk everybody lets take daddy to court for all his retirement and stick him with the kids also, he had to leave law enforcement on early retirement for defending himself against someone his partner was supposed to be handling who attacked him from behind, b ut according to the dept backhanding a white woman just isn\'t done when your black, needless to say it dragged through the courts for a couple of years, but he got his early retirement, back pay and his attorney made out like a bandit, no settlement money as the city manager resigned and there didn\'t seem to be any insurance against a law suit so I suppose he was lucky to manage to get what he did from them, sorry too much info, ttyl #1, #4 signing off