Will the hammer fall.......
It's been a while since I've written, but I'm feeling a little anxious lately. Does anyone else find it difficult to live with cancer hanging over your head? I do. I was stage II when I was diagnosised. It had traveled to my lymph nodes. So the cancer could travel to any part of my body from there. I am keeping up with my checkup every three months. Nothing to report there, but lately I just feel it's only a matter of time that it will come back.
Maybe because a family friend is currently dying in hospice due to brain cancer that was diagnosised 3 months ago and was "clear" after surgery. Chemo was just precautionary. Then my uncle is fighting stage III lung cancer. Things are not good there either. When does it stop? This disease is all over the place.
I had cross words with my aunt today (not related to my uncle who is sick). She actually is mad at me because of a generic comment I posted on facebook three months ago. Today was the first time she mentioned it. I told her I was frustrated that day, but I thought we were past it. Apparently she is not. Understand I did not hint or mention I was talking about her, but she connected the dots. My aunt is 64 years old and she acts like a high schooler. She also knows the family friend who is in hospice.
It just crosses my mind that when you're about to leave this world, is any of this important? I am 18 years younger than my aunt. I worry about dying. This pettiness is not important. Family and living is. Sometimes you get frustrated with people. You may say or imply things you shouldn't, but life isn't about those things. Life needs to be treasured. I want to treasure mine because I just have this fear that I'm not going to live to a "ripe old age"
I'm not real sure how I am concluding here. I thought it was a good idea to write things down and maybe I can process my feelings a little better.
TREASURE EVERYTHING EVERYDAY!!
Maybe because a family friend is currently dying in hospice due to brain cancer that was diagnosised 3 months ago and was "clear" after surgery. Chemo was just precautionary. Then my uncle is fighting stage III lung cancer. Things are not good there either. When does it stop? This disease is all over the place.
I had cross words with my aunt today (not related to my uncle who is sick). She actually is mad at me because of a generic comment I posted on facebook three months ago. Today was the first time she mentioned it. I told her I was frustrated that day, but I thought we were past it. Apparently she is not. Understand I did not hint or mention I was talking about her, but she connected the dots. My aunt is 64 years old and she acts like a high schooler. She also knows the family friend who is in hospice.
It just crosses my mind that when you're about to leave this world, is any of this important? I am 18 years younger than my aunt. I worry about dying. This pettiness is not important. Family and living is. Sometimes you get frustrated with people. You may say or imply things you shouldn't, but life isn't about those things. Life needs to be treasured. I want to treasure mine because I just have this fear that I'm not going to live to a "ripe old age"
I'm not real sure how I am concluding here. I thought it was a good idea to write things down and maybe I can process my feelings a little better.
TREASURE EVERYTHING EVERYDAY!!
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