Why is it?

Why is it that because you leave you aren't suppose to be hurting?  I left my husband because I couldn't take it no more.  You never knew if the bills were going to get paid.  He was the major money maker in the home but spent more then he made.  We lost our house in December.  He wanted me to come home at first but what was I going home to?  The house isn't ours anymore and he has to get out now.  So if I would have stayed I would be looking for another place by now anyway.  I couldn't trust him in what he said because he lied all the time.  All his children have mental challenges due to their mother and I was always running them back and forth from doctor to counselors and everywhere else.  I really didn't mind doing this except while I delt with their needs he did nothing.  Then after I told him I was leaving he filed for divorce before I would leave the house.  He is claiming cruelty to the kids.  How dare him, I took care of his kids for 7 years and now after I start to leave he wants to say I was cruel to them.  I have tried to stay friends with him even after I found out he was cheating on me.  I think he has more then one girlfriend and one is his exwife.  I think that one hurts more.  Don't I have the right to be angry and hurt with all of this?  Just because I was the one to leave why should I still not care and be hurting this way.

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deleted_user
deleted_user

AMEN! I feel the same way, and in fact, you sound like me! I left my husband, too. Mainly for financial problems, but there were emotional ones, too. I feel as if, because I left, I am in the wrong sometimes. And that our hurt isnt as bad as, say, their hurt. Know what I mean? I know you do! It hurt like hell and more when my stbx got a gf three months after I left! This is the same bit*h that is now trying to mess with my head! Oh, I cant stand her. But anyway...

I know how you feel. I never knew when the bills were gonna get paid. The day I left, there was no heat in the house because he didnt pay the gas bill. He will tell everyone that the heat was turned on later that day, but that is not the point. I came home to no water many times over the ten yrs I was married to him.

I have questioned myself many times this past yr wondering if I did the right thing. I did it for my sanity, and my childrens safety.

This is about you and your journal. I think we could become very good friends:)

Just remember, I know how you feel. Probably to a tee!