WHY is all I Want to Know
I just want to know why,why did this happen to me and my kids? It makes no sense. He was 47,not 87, How can this be real? If it's a nightmare,then why don't I wake up?Am I in a coma somewhere and living this life while Im in a coma?I wish I could understand. My sister say's that when you are born that God already knows the date of your death and that he was suppose to die that day and that no matter what I could have done different,or how we could have changed thing's that day that he still would have died because God called him home.But, I keep wondering if he had taken the heart medicine and other medicine like he should have,would it have made a difference?Could he have been saved if he had not been in MS moving stuff,instead been here in TN where we have decent doctor's,would it have helped? I just wish that he was with us where he should be, How can we possibly go on without him? We are constantly upset over being sure that we can get by,right now we have 5 dollars to put gas in the car and that's it,Have to wait till 1st on everything,suppose to be moving out of this rattrap apt. other 2 checks do not come till the 3rd,the woman we are suppose to rent from has never rented before and can't make up her mind on anything,she suppose to had a lease done last wk and we still don't know that we are going to be able to get it,I hate having to rent,we had our own house,but lost it cause I can't afford to pay 1328 month.So we have no choice but to rent.might just as well take 600 a mth and throw it down the toliet.Oh dear God,all these changes, I just can't handle it!I know I'm going to have to get a job when I lose 982 a month cause my daughter turns 16,then I won't get ss till I turn 60,thats 12 and a half yrs away.I have noexperience doing much,Pat made good money driving a truck,I'm use to 800 a wk bring home and our son's ssi at 674,we had plenty to live on,now we are doing good if we have enough to eat and put gas in the car.We don't really do anything but sit here and the kid's hate it and so do I.We were use to going to Gatlinburg,Pigeon Forge,over to N Carolina,KY VA,alway's going places and doing thing's together.All that ended on August 1,and like I said all I want is to know WHY?
Replies
I am so sorry for your pain, it is so new and overwhelming. All you can do right now is try to take care of you. Try to take deep breaths and just get through one day at a time.
I know, I have been exactly where you are, and it is so painful. My hubby was also 47 and also died suddenly and unexpectedly. I asked all the same questions, and I remember wishing I had been in a car accident and I was in a coma dreaming this nightmare. I am so sorry that it can\'t be that way for either of us.
Please just know there are people here that understand and are willing to listen. I know that is not much help when you are in pain and financially strapped, but please know we care.
Just a thought, when your daughter turns 16 YOU no longer get SS benefits, but does the whole amount revert to her. I know that is what others here have thought, but when your child turns 16, it just means you as the mom can no longer collect anything. The entire amount then is paid to the child until they are 18. Hope this helps a little.
Hugs today, Dawn
Thank\'s Dawn,
It is just so hard trying to get by when you are use to having a hard working,truck driving,husband and then in one moment GONE! I just miss him more than word\'s can say.I will get my money till she turns 16 but that\'s just till Feb.so, I know I have to get a job which is scary for me, I haven\'t worked in year\'s and when I did it was just as a salesperson and only lasted 6 months cause I needed to be with the kids.I feel like 60 is a long way off although I know at 47 it\'s not.That\'s when ss says I will get money again.I really can\'t believe all this ,as I\'m sure you can\'t either.I think when it happens suddenly like both our husband\'s did,that it\'s such a shock that it just seem\'s so unreal.Blessing\'s to you, Hopefully we can all get through this somehow. Hug\'s Mary
I BELIEVE that a child can get Social Security benefits beyond age 18 IF they are still in school/college. Be sure & check that out with the Social Security Administration. Give them a call or go on their website.
If you begin to collect Widows Benefits @ age 60, it is at a reduced rate; would not be at 100%. But ask all of those questions of a Social Security rep.
I understand your pain. My husband died suddenly & unexpectedly too. I kept thinking \"will this nightmare end; I just want to wake up to my life\".
Please take care.