WHY DID IT HAVE TO HAPPEN
WELL MY BEST FRIEND/ADOPTED SISTER CALLED ME YESTERDAY TO LET ME KNOW THAT HER FATHER (MY ADOPTED FATHER) KILLED HIMSELF YESTERDAY, AND NOBODY HAD THE FUCKING BALLS TO CALL ME LAST WEEK TO LET ME KNOW THAT MY ADOPTED BROTHER KILLED HIMSELF LAST WEEK.............. I AM IN SOME SERIOUS PAIN RIGHT NOW IT'S PATHETIC, I WANT TO KILL MYSELF AND BE WITH THEM AGAIN BUT I AM BETTER THAN THAT........... I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE IT'S DRIVING ME NUTS.................. I GOT ALL OF THIS INFORMATION YESTERDAY MORNING............. THAT IS ONE HELL OF A WAKE UP CALL.................... YOUR ADOPTED FATHER KILLED HIMSELF YESTERDAY AND YOUR ADOPTED BROTHER KILLED HIMSELF LAST WEEK................... DUMB BITCH THANKS FOR CALLING ME YESTERDAY TO LET ME KNOW THAT I HAD A FUNERAL TO GO TO LAT WEEK.................. HE WAS THE CLOSEST THING TO A FATHER THAT I HAD.................... HE WAS MORE OF A FATHER TO ME THEN MY OWN FATHER................... NOW ALL THAT IS GOING THRU MY HEAD IS TO KILL MYSELF.................. IT IS 5:11AM MY TIME AND I AM WIDE AWAKE BECAUSE OF THE FACT THAT ALL I HAVE BEEN DOING IS BALLING MY EYES OUT ALL DAMN DAY YESTERDAY............. I'M BALLING MY EYES OUT RIGHT NOW TRYING TO TYPE THIS JOURNAL ENTRY................ OMG WHY DID THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN???????????????? WHY ME???????????????????? WHAT THE HELL WERE THEY THINKING????????????????? CAN I PLEASE JOIN THEM?????????????????? ALL OF THESE QUESTIONS ARE RUNNING THRU MY HEAD RIGHT NOW RIGHT ALONG WITH THE THOUGHT OF KILLING MYSELF....................
Replies
First off, whatever you do, DO GO TO THE DOC OR ER before you hurt yourself. There are so many people out there that care for you and will hurt as badly as you are hurting right now if you make a decision to hurt yourself. I care for one. Please Please Please go to the DOC before doing anything. I am so sorry for all the pain you are in. I have lost several family members and a dear friend in a relatively short period of time, all thru natural causes so I can somewhat understand your pain. But I cant imagine what kind of pain it would be if they had taken their own lives. I am here if you need to talk and I will do whatever I can, thru the medium of print, to keep you safe. Just know that you are loved and we would all miss you so terribly if anything happened. Take good care of yourself please...Hugz, Barb
\"And said, Where have ye laid him? They said unto him, Lord, come and see.
Jesus wept.
Then said the Jews, Behold how he loved him!\"
John 11:34-36
A love that is so great in your heart should pray for both of them, knowing that the Love you feel comes from the source for God is Love! May the Lord provide you with His Comfort and Peace during this difficult time, God bless you!
some ppl feel the stress is too much for them. they feel alone. i feel alone alot and used to be suicidal. sorry about the death
I am sorry it took me this long to type something. I know you are hurting and you may feel that there isn\'t anything to live for. I know, I feel it everyday, and I am not trying to make this about me; I am trying to tell you that there would be so many people that would be crushed if you weren\'t around anymore. The pain of your loss will be fresh for quite awhile, and there will be days you wonder why bother living, but with time, and the love of people who care so much about you; things will be a little easier. Just try to take it day by day, and if you feel like crying, throwing something, yelling at someone, or whatever, DO IT. You have every right to do any of those things. Hell, if you want, you can yell at me, tell me off, or whatever you need to do. I am your friend, and I can take it. I know you are going through hell right now, and dealing with so much loss; I would do whatever it takes to help you & support you in any way I can. So, please remember I am here for you, and I am so sorry for your loss.