Where have I gone wrong?
At 70, I had, I thought, a good relationship with our three grown up sons and four lovely grandchildren.
We visited them all over Christmas - they all live several hours drive from us - and I took loads of photos of a great Christmas together,
I was excited about my forthcoming 70th birthday party with over 30 friends, and also about making plans for our Golden Wedding next year. I told them that my dream would be to hire a cottage large enough for all of us by the sea, as we rarely get all the family together.
I was horrified when my middle son sent emails to his brothers shortly after we got home, saying that our relationship was 'unsustainable'. I was manipulative, talked about my health all the time,that I was idle and left all the cooking, cleaning and gardening to my husband, --- and he wanted little more to do with me. He wanted to leave the room when I was there.
I know I'm not perfect, but my family has always been at the centre of my life. I wondered why that son never phoned to see how we were -we always phone every week to see if the family is OK
I've always loved cooking, sewing and gardening, and health is not something we talk about in our family - so felt puzzled and hurt be his untrue accusations.
I sent an email saying that I would always love him, but would be too embarrassed and upset to stay with him again knowing how he felt about me. All I asked was a card saying he didn't mean the cruel things he said.
I haven't spoken to him since January, but have cried most days and don't know how to go on.
We visited them all over Christmas - they all live several hours drive from us - and I took loads of photos of a great Christmas together,
I was excited about my forthcoming 70th birthday party with over 30 friends, and also about making plans for our Golden Wedding next year. I told them that my dream would be to hire a cottage large enough for all of us by the sea, as we rarely get all the family together.
I was horrified when my middle son sent emails to his brothers shortly after we got home, saying that our relationship was 'unsustainable'. I was manipulative, talked about my health all the time,that I was idle and left all the cooking, cleaning and gardening to my husband, --- and he wanted little more to do with me. He wanted to leave the room when I was there.
I know I'm not perfect, but my family has always been at the centre of my life. I wondered why that son never phoned to see how we were -we always phone every week to see if the family is OK
I've always loved cooking, sewing and gardening, and health is not something we talk about in our family - so felt puzzled and hurt be his untrue accusations.
I sent an email saying that I would always love him, but would be too embarrassed and upset to stay with him again knowing how he felt about me. All I asked was a card saying he didn't mean the cruel things he said.
I haven't spoken to him since January, but have cried most days and don't know how to go on.
Replies
I am brand new to this site, but have been suffering the agony of rejection from my adult daughter for years now, basically, by myself, my husband doesnt want to hear it anymore, my sons are tired of hearing about it, so I remain, most of the time, devastated, emotionally gutted and miserable! I am not currently in the right state of mind mentally to write everything that has transpired between us, but I Know I will soon, because I know it will be therapeutic for me to share with other people who will understand and have experiences of their own. I feel compelled to tell you though, that just from reading this, that YOU ARE NOT ALONE! and thanks to this site, Im not alone anymore either, Praise God!