Whensday
Dearest,
The other day I wanted to get some pics from your computer to mine, rather than walk a thumb drive across the house I just e-mailed them to myself.
Today’s an anniversary. Exactly one year ago today we sat in Dr. Rainbows off ice and he told us that you had Intra-hepatic cholangiocarcinoma. He said that you would die from it, the last time any medical professional told us the truth, and we didn’t believe him. How could we? I’ve been thinking about that all day. How fast it went. How badly.
I finally got all caught up on the shoveling, time for it to snow some more. I turned off your cell phone today. Feel bad about it, feel like I am an accomplice in something. I know how you loved that phone. It was your connection to everyone and everything. I just don’t see the sense in paying the bill every month for something that no one uses.
I went in to my computer last night to check my e-mails, and there . . .right at the top of the list, was an e-mail from you. Could this be spam? I checked the date and it was from this week. Could it be you? Could you send me an e-mail? Could someone be playing some kind of a sick joke? What kind of a sociopath would do something like that? What kind of sick demented bastid? No subject line. My heart was racing. My hand was shaking as I clicked the mouse. The e-mail opened, - no text – just some attachments. Pictures! OH my god it was ME! I sent it and forgot all about it. Nearly gave myself a heart attack.
MY BRAIN IS MUSH!!.
Maybe I need to be institutionalized?
Gotta go pay the bills.
Till later, your Ken
The other day I wanted to get some pics from your computer to mine, rather than walk a thumb drive across the house I just e-mailed them to myself.
Today’s an anniversary. Exactly one year ago today we sat in Dr. Rainbows off ice and he told us that you had Intra-hepatic cholangiocarcinoma. He said that you would die from it, the last time any medical professional told us the truth, and we didn’t believe him. How could we? I’ve been thinking about that all day. How fast it went. How badly.
I finally got all caught up on the shoveling, time for it to snow some more. I turned off your cell phone today. Feel bad about it, feel like I am an accomplice in something. I know how you loved that phone. It was your connection to everyone and everything. I just don’t see the sense in paying the bill every month for something that no one uses.
I went in to my computer last night to check my e-mails, and there . . .right at the top of the list, was an e-mail from you. Could this be spam? I checked the date and it was from this week. Could it be you? Could you send me an e-mail? Could someone be playing some kind of a sick joke? What kind of a sociopath would do something like that? What kind of sick demented bastid? No subject line. My heart was racing. My hand was shaking as I clicked the mouse. The e-mail opened, - no text – just some attachments. Pictures! OH my god it was ME! I sent it and forgot all about it. Nearly gave myself a heart attack.
MY BRAIN IS MUSH!!.
Maybe I need to be institutionalized?
Gotta go pay the bills.
Till later, your Ken
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