When things go like this its hard to find the rainbow

I don't think I will be okay for a week or two, perhaps longer from what the doctor's are saying. I am having a reaction to the neurontin big time. My feet are swollen, and feel bruised when I walk on them and have been for a month and a half now ( corisponds to when they doubled the dosage of neurontin). About 3 weeks ago we started reducing the amount of neurontin that I take. I thought I was doing better, headaches easing off, swelling going down on my feet, then wam- my left foot swells a lot, and it feels like I am stepping down on a knife and pushing it up my leg when I put weight on the leg. At first I thought I had maybe sprained it or something ( while nightmares of rsd traveling drift through my brain and I push that away), so I wracked my brain for a time I might have hurt it with no luck, and as my husband pointed out and the doctor agreed there is no bruising, just large amount of swelling. To make this whole thing worse it is 110 today, 108 yesterday-more heat predicted for tomorrow. We do not have air conditioning, just two fans, and I am not doing well in the heat. I am on overdrive for sweating, doctor says its the neurontin, but I can't drink enough for the amount I am loosing and dehidration is a real problem.  My arm is reacting negatively to all this, burning pain is back 24/7, sharp stabbing pain and horrible aching in the bones and joints. I feel like my body has completely fallen apart, and old age has set in. My vision and hearing are going, all apendages having issues,I move in an odd painful shuffle, bodily functions screwed up, not sure yet what is working right at the moment.The swelling is causing the carpal tunnel in my right hand to go crazy with zapping me whenever I grip something or move my hand wrong. Left hand is unusable and horribly angry with pain. My shoulder and the base of my neck is very swollen, red, and burning to the touch.We've already covered my legs and feet for the most part/ knees hurt when I bend them or get up.It doesn't help right now that I react to pain by having hot flashes. Ever had a hot flash in 110 degree heat? I do not recomend it. I find myself spending a lot of time in bed with my legs elevated on 5 pillows, head and neck elevated, arms above my head, fan blowing directly on me, ice water in a water bottle to spray me down- probably look like a beached whale gasping for air, not a pretty site. I am not obese technically yet, but well on my way there with the weight gain I have been having since starting neurontin. 30 pounds in 7 months, at one point I gained 7 pounds in two weeks between doctor's visits, and since I have nausea and no appetite- it has to be all water gain. Great-clothes not fitting is becoming a huge issue, luckly I don't go anywhere except to the doctor's office as a general rule. Don't leave the house much really. My family is frantic because they see how bad I am doing, so I am trying to hide it better but doing a lousy job of that, too! Today I tried to get up and move around, get small things accomplished (make tea and lemonaide, big accomplishment  ) just to end up scaring my family more. My oldest daughter keeps asking me to call the doctor's every day, I try to reasure her, but she's scared I will die, but atleast she is still talking to me about her fears and I can discuss them with her. My youngest is trying to do everything for me, bring me anything I want so I don't have to walk, and takes it bad when I tell her I must move or it will make everything worse on how I feel. Understanding RSD is terrible to do when you are only 12 years old, she keeps kissing it and wishing my arm, body to heal. If only it would. And well my poor husband is so worried and upset that I worry about his high blood pressure. He has been fantastic during this time, but I need to get better and not cause so much worry and place such a huge burden on him. There has to be a rainbow out there somewhere I just haven't found it yet!   I thought I would start journaling here and in my pain journal at home so my friends I have made will know why I haven't been online a lot lately, or talking much. Having someone to chat with has been wonderful, because I know the person I am talking to understands what I am trying to tell them.   I am so fustrated and tired right now the heat and pain are wearing me out-probably won't be online much until late at night when the temp is at it's lowest and I feel as good as it gets right now.It is late here and still 100 degrees, not much of an improvement, but better than the unofficial 110 degrees my husband's work recorded today. Ugh- and too think I used to be a summer bunny and soak in heat like it was liquid sunshine, making me golden brown and happy in my teen years! If only I could do that now. I will try to journal daily if possible to anyone intrested will have an update on how I am feeling, but can't guarentee it right now!