When it rains it pours! (my dark humor)

 
When it rains it pours.
And when it shits it f*cking diarrheas!
 
Alright, I admit that was really really disgusting. But I wont apologize for it.
 
So anyone else feel like sometimes, when life throws you lemons, what it's really doing is slowly unfolding a massive cluster of chaos and insanity? Like once it starts throwing you crap it just WONT STOP. And then suddenly you just crack. And you're like  "WHAT THE SH*T, LIFE?! JUST STOP IT ALREADY!"
 
It's as if some d-bag starts off throwing little pieces of paper at you and then suddenly he starts shooting spitballs, then he's throwing giant erasers at your face until he PICKS UP A STAPLE GUN AND STARTS VICIOUSLY PELTING YOU WITH STAPLES ANDwow this sounds like a five year old crackhead with office supplies. This analogy is horrible and offensive I'm sorry.
 Anyway, the objects he's throwing become heavier and heavier until you break down and you're like "I MUST PUT A STOP TO THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL!" So you pick up the closest object which turns out to be a freaking samurai sword WHERE DID THAT COME FROM and you start swinging EVERYWHERE! ...Until you realize you've gone completely bat sh*t insane and could probably use a time out.

This is all metaphorically speaking by the way. I was trying to dramatically and imaginatively describe a breakdown.
 
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