Whatever it is/is - what I want it to be

I want to change I want to change thingsseems like I'm almost getting thru but thenI don't know againI'm confusedand I'm hopefuland my sadness is a companion I fear with every breath of hope I takeLord help me understandDo you love me? I am weak LordBring me into the lightfill my heart with grace and let me do your biddingand hold the hands of all the children still hiding in the shadowsof a half lived life In Jesus holy name Amen