What the heck do they expect?
So Ken tells me this morning that my granddaughter Christina confided in him that she is upset because I got an angel charm on my Pandora bracelet in honor of Kelsey before I got a charm for Eddie. (I had explained to her that I wear a gold necklace with a cross EVERY day that Eddie had given me in honor of Ed). My adopted daughter Donna, gave me another angel charm to in honor of Ed on mother's day and I wear that every day now as well. I think of both Eddie and Kelsey every day.
Then she tells Ken she "doesn't like it when I refer to Donna as my daughter". Well as most of you know Donna's mom is in Heaven and so is my son so I have adopted her, her husband and her children as my own and as Donna said "we still miss them but our bond helps to fill a void."
So then Ken tells me I can't say anything to Christina coz she told him this in confidence and I said, "well, I tell all of the family that I keep no secrets from you, so you know what, all bets are off".
I live my life by being honest and I will talk to her. I also live by delivering difficult messages in a kind, honest and direct way and I cannot be responsible for her reaction, but I hope she will understand.
I don't know what she expects. I am struggling as hard as I can to try and integrate the loss of Eddie into my life and also the passing of Kelsey who Ken & I had big plans for - all with the blessing of her family. Christina has this dynamic with my DIL, her mom. My DIL has clearly favored Joshua as anyone in the family would tell you. Even Ed used to get on Elaine about not having favorites and Ed sometimes would overcompensate for this by spoiling Christina. She is 19 and a mom now so I thought she had put some of the jealousy behind her and I certainly do not have favorites between Christina & Josh and I think this is more about her issue with her mom than about me but I do need to clear the air with her.
OMGosh! It is not a competition! I am just trying to find some semblance of happiness in this life. People criticize if we still we cry, grieve, or even try to have a life. Darned if you do and darned if you don't. No one understands but my friends here. No one.
Well, thank you for letting me vent. It helps.
Love and peace, Linda
Then she tells Ken she "doesn't like it when I refer to Donna as my daughter". Well as most of you know Donna's mom is in Heaven and so is my son so I have adopted her, her husband and her children as my own and as Donna said "we still miss them but our bond helps to fill a void."
So then Ken tells me I can't say anything to Christina coz she told him this in confidence and I said, "well, I tell all of the family that I keep no secrets from you, so you know what, all bets are off".
I live my life by being honest and I will talk to her. I also live by delivering difficult messages in a kind, honest and direct way and I cannot be responsible for her reaction, but I hope she will understand.
I don't know what she expects. I am struggling as hard as I can to try and integrate the loss of Eddie into my life and also the passing of Kelsey who Ken & I had big plans for - all with the blessing of her family. Christina has this dynamic with my DIL, her mom. My DIL has clearly favored Joshua as anyone in the family would tell you. Even Ed used to get on Elaine about not having favorites and Ed sometimes would overcompensate for this by spoiling Christina. She is 19 and a mom now so I thought she had put some of the jealousy behind her and I certainly do not have favorites between Christina & Josh and I think this is more about her issue with her mom than about me but I do need to clear the air with her.
OMGosh! It is not a competition! I am just trying to find some semblance of happiness in this life. People criticize if we still we cry, grieve, or even try to have a life. Darned if you do and darned if you don't. No one understands but my friends here. No one.
Well, thank you for letting me vent. It helps.
Love and peace, Linda
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