What\'s the point?
I feel a little better today. I finally got my disability check from the EDD. It wasn't as much money as I had hoped but at least it's something. I've been feeling old and useless and wondering if I will ever have a life again. I got a call from my nephew and felt a little better, he brings me back to reality, I sometimes feel like I'm losing my identity. My world revolved arount my mom and my work and I've lost both. I don't even know if I will be able to continue in my apartment next year. I couldn't get my digital converter box to work and don't know if I will be able to watch tv once they change over.
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Losing your Mum meant having a lfe-style change forced upon you, along with the grief of losing her. To have to suffer ill health and lose your source of income as well is a huge blow. I\'m not surprised you feel as though you\'ve lost your identity, as it\'s changed so very drastically. Have you considered bereavement counselling? It sounds as though you\'re good at writing down how you feel, so perhaps talking it though with someone might help you see a path into a happier future. I read C S Lewis, A grief observed after my Nana died, and while it was sad it helped me see I wasn\'t alone in the way I felt.