What's The Point

I'm feeling pretty worthless...again. I don't have anything to offer my family, my friends--anybody. I ought to be use to this by now. You would think that after 10 years I would have figured this chronic pain stuff out, but sitting alone again while everyone else has a great time is getting old. I know everybody's busy. They don't have time to waste on me. I can't keep up at all. I can stand all of 5 minutes, and on a good day I can walk about 10 feet before crumbling. I just get in everybody's way. So I just sit here and watch my family go about their day, full of happiness and not even noticing me. I guess I've become invisible. They're so use to seeing me do nothing that they don't even realize I'm here. I want to jump up and down and scream HEY REMEMBER ME? I USE TO LIVE HERE... I USE TO BE A PART OF THIS FAMILY...I USED TO BE SOMEBODY!!!! Now I don't know. I just don't know.

Replies

lindsey2008
lindsey2008

Wow, sweetie, I had no idea things were this bad for you. Maybe you should tell your wife exactly how your feeling. I would let her know I hurt and just because I can\'t stand for long periods of time I still do have a heart with feelings and vocal cords to have a nice conversation with you. Please don\'t make me feel invisible. I have a feeling you 2 definitly need to comunicate more and if I\'m out of line for saying this I opoligise now!!

My Prayers are with you. I do hope things get better for you...Big Hugs xox xox xox
mike45
mike45

Thanks Lindsey,
You\'re right we do need to communicate more. I\'m working on that.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Mike,
I saw that you\'d given some help to a Medicare questioner, so you\'re obviously a caring and capable person. I have serious long-term depression that gets worse if I get sick, and I\'ve been sick with a fever for a couple of days. BUT, you know what makes me feel better (and I bet it could work for you)? Two things, and you already know one: helping someone else. Helping LOT\'s of someone else\'s - become an expert on something and share what you learn! The other thing, and it\'s kind of related, find something that you can do sitting down that you can get excited about! Stamp collecting? Jigsaw puzzles? Making a blog or two? Writing your autobiography? Raising tropical fish (I don\'t think you have to stand a lot to do that)? The more you get excited and into what you\'ve decided to do, the less you\'ll be left out because people will want to be around this person with all the positive energy. Yes, you can\'t do all the physical stuff but you can do a lot of other stuff. You can take courses from MIT for free online! Go to your library\'s website and explore the databases that are there - I\'m a librarian and we have some awesome databases - courses for college credit, language learning, so many more. When my neck was messed up once and all my friends were birdwatchers - I couldn\'t look up to see the birds they were all looking at BUT I looked down and learned a lot about mosses and ferns. Pretty much, just look around! Good luck to you. PS I didn\'t know what degenerative disc disease was so I googled it and it sounds like it might not be the sentence for misery that it sounds like. Go look here: http://www.spine-health.com/conditions/degenerative-disc-disease/what-degenerative-disc-disease .. again - Good Luck to you - you can make your life alive again!